Oh dear. Seems like the school is under terrible threat, doesn't it?

But don't worry. Gilderoy lockhart to the rescue! I shall erradicate the source of illness and bring everything back to normal.

No need to thank me, my friends. It's all part of being so wonderful.

To the slimy, prepubescent child who has called me repulsive and old: you can only wish you'll have my looks when you get to be my age - which, I should point out, is not that advanced.

And you're on my dark list, sonny boy. If You-No-Who attacks this school again, there will be no rescue for you.

( Private to my glorious, wonderful self. )

( Private to my own, glorious self. )

( Private to my own, wonderful self. )

What the hell is going on?

And what can I do to help?

You know, I am appalled with the students in this school. Kissing booths?! You mean your personal lives are so empty and your self-confidence is so lacking you have to pay to be kissed? Merlin, if you had come to me, I'd have kissed you for free.

Well, maybe not the male students. Or the ghosts. Then, you'd have to pay.Hm, you know, that's not a ( Read more... )