I love children, but there are some bad ones out there and to them I have some things to tell. Just a little side note ( Read more... )

Worst Movie Ever: The Stupids- People don't even remember this movie, so I was beginning to think it was an old, past figment of my imagination. However, my imagination would never think up anything so shitty. The movie reminded me of Pleasantville on ecstacy with a little bit of bad acting thrown in. Simply disgraceful ( Read more... )

Ebonics has become a third language in America, English in a close second, and Spanish reigning supreme. I think it should be a requirement to learn to write, read, and at the very least, speak the English language if you want to be an American citizen. So to all you Ricamada Gomezes out there... ABCDEFG learn English if you want to talk to me. ( Read more... )

I haven't written in here in months. I am a fucking disgrace ( Read more... )

This is serious, and will soon be added to "Mary's Future List of Laws ( Read more... )

Things I Would Like to See Destroyed ( Read more... )

Whoever said, "Money doesn't buy happiness" was a fucking idiot, not to mention a liar.

I am now accepting donations.

What they said: (In regards to buffalo wings) "Is it spicy?"
What I said: "We have a choice between hot or mild."
What they said: "Well is mild spicy?"
What I said: "It's mild.  Mildy-spicy."
What they said: "Well is it too spicy to eat?"
What I said: "Apparenly not if people eat it all the time."
What they said: "Well how spicy would you say it is ( Read more... )

This Was On the News: "Up next... back to school for an eighty-four year old entering the first grade. His story and more next." You HAVE GOT to be fucking kidding me. Put on some adult pampers or crawl in the coffin. Take your pick. This is not a time for first fucking grade ( Read more... )

I have compiled a list of people that if they ever become president, you can guarantee that I will hang myself or move to Bangladesh and worship Allah with the best of them. And it reads ( Read more... )