I just realized how much I need music to survive. I noticed how vital of a role it actually plays in my life. How easily it can show my feelings. Hearing it, playing it, or singing it. How much stress it can really release from me. How it can speak for me when I am tired of talking. The way it can show someone how you may feel about them. I love it ( Read more... )

Oh good ol' livejournal, how do I still even have you, yet use you still? I had 2 myspaces and deleted them both before you! Almost 3 years with you buddy!
Anyways I've had a real epiphany on life lately, I've seen that I enjoy being lonely and not being in a relationship. Every night I asked god and though constantly about how bad I wanted a ( Read more... )

There have been days where I've hated myself and loved myself. Most have been loving and today has been loathing. I've felt like shit, I've been angry at myself and I take everything so personally, I work myself over until I'm exhausted. I'm mad at myself over choices I've made. I feel like the root of all problems, it feels like life would be ( Read more... )

Took me a while to get here but I'm here I coudlnt find the post button!!!! I was just sitting at my moms computer thinking of my fave game. It turns out to be truth or dare. Its a very complex game man, I hate when peopllleee sayy trrrrutth it takes out all the motha fuckin fun. I mean come on yo who doesn't want to make someone lick another ( Read more... )

I spent a whole day with a really good looking girl, really nice and everything. All of that stuff. I just couldn't get into it really. Conversation was alright but I didn't feel an attraction at all. Usually I can within a few hours but I felt nothing. I was thinking to myself "I don't have any trust issues, I have forgave myself ,and other people ( Read more... )

After last night I'm no longer going to be the same person. I'm going to be ruthless, I don't care anymore. I'm going to spit on whomever steps in my way and tries to stop me. Its too boring being stepped on. It's time for change, and it is now

I was sitting on my front porch waiting to leave my dads, and I stopped and for some reason I thought to myself. Why am I here? I never really thought of physically hurting myself and I never will. I was thinking what if I wasn't here? Would some lives be better or worse. Sometimes I feel like there isn't a point too life but I trudge through it ( Read more... )

Last night we all headed down to johns and all hung out usually like the crew does. They smoked and I decided to have a party night and what the hell I toked with them all like I do every once in a blue moon. It was pretty fun, I came home to kiki in my room and he made me a sandwich!! I love him, I was laying in bed and thinking about the good ( Read more... )

Tonight was a good night, even though the barbacue was post poned for a few hours due to rain, and lack of resources. We finally got it going and it went great. Uhm Trevor, John, Dulani, Tyler, Sergio, Brittany were here at first. We all hung out!! I loved seeing brittany! even if it was for only a minute! You grew the fuck up girl!!! Its been like ( Read more... )

My soul is setting
but
My spirit is rising
"To release someone you have to forgive them. If you truly forgive someone (or yourself), you cannot `blame' that person, even though to the rational mind he/she is `blameworthy'. It follows that, if you do not `blame' a person, you cannot `resent'. In the same way, if you do not `resent', you cannot hold ( Read more... )