Not that anyone reads this shit, but damn I'm having a hard time keeping my shit together tonight.

Filed divorce paperwork and I feel like the whole world is crashing down. Failure. No belief in real love (whatever the hell that is).

I feel alone. I feel stupid. I feel let down. I feel like I deserved more. I'm so sad. I feel unwanted. Not good ( Read more... )

I'm good people. I've spent the vast majority of my life trying to be good people. I sometimes don't know why I try so freaking hard. I'm so much better to people than they deserve. I seriously need counseling to figure that shit out.

Where have all the good men gone, by the way? I suppose they are all married or hiding in a hole somewhere. When I ( Read more... )

Have I mentioned just how much it sucks to drive for 11 hours? I mean, on a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being shoot me now, it's pretty much an 11.

My back and shoulder are NOT happy with me, but soon it will be done. Only 5 more hours. Luckily I've been occupied with driving and texting people when I'm not driving. Got in touch with an old friend. It's ( Read more... )

I have no idea why I'm not curled up in a ball on the floor balling uncontrollably right now. Oh wait, yes I do. Because I'm surrounded by my family. Thank God for that. The last 48 hours have been something out of a nightmare. I'm not even sure it all really happened.

The place I work is, by far, the most hostile workplace I've ever worked. Full ( Read more... )

It's crazy to me how many people have low self esteem. The people you wouldn't think do. Like Stephen Colbert.

I struggle with it, but there comes a point in your life where you need to believe in yourself. You have to be the light in the dark. You have to know you're worth it. I know I'm not the smartest person or the most attractive person, but ( Read more... )

This is what happens when you take 7 months off and then you go back into the work force as if a toddler learning to walk.

Today is the first time in a very, very long time that I didn't eat lunch because I just wasn't hungry. That's saying a lot. I used to work at Facebook!

I've lost my appetite almost completely, even when working out and ( Read more... )

The older I get, the more I believe that true love is actually what I feel for my friends and family. Romantic movie love is fleeting. It's lust wrapped up with un-realistic expectations. As time goes on, it fades.

Not so with my friends and family. If anything I love them more with every passing day. I think about them a lot and feel so lucky to ( Read more... )

So, in an amazing turn of events, I've accepted a job at a music festival. For the first time since 2008, I'm going to be something different than being an admin! I'll be the Guest Services Product Manager. FANCY! Just like me! I have a mentor and my career towards operations is finally on track ( Read more... )

Maybe. I'm not super keen on the idea, but I also need healthcare, a place to live, and income... so I can't not work ever again ( Read more... )

I wish it wasn't so hard to tell people no. I have to start putting myself first. Seriously. WTF? I need to care about what I want and how I feel. It's going to hurt some people, but whatever, it's not like I'm being mean about it ( Read more... )