Sometimes I feel like I don't have anywhere to exist but here. And here is not what I want. Sometimes I wish I had never met Nathan. My life is easy now, but I very much do not have what I want. I feel like I have sacrificed myself for a world in which living is easy and I'll always have good food and a warm place to sleep. But this is not who I am ( Read more... )

Hello Livejournal ( Read more... )

Nathan stays up far too late playing WoW. Doesn't even tuck me in or kiss me goodnight anymore, just says he'll be a 'a couple minutes'. I awake at 2 or 3am to find him right where I left him, playing games. His side of the bed is cold and I am freezing without his body heat. It makes me sad. Really sad. He drinks and plays games. Works 9 hours a ( Read more... )

I saw this awesome notebook today that was a five year journal. each date had its own page, divided into five sections, each section with about 4 lines of space. It just seems like such an awesome idea. Remember when we used to do Thankful Thursdays? It'd be awesome to do something like that but with a different short topic every day. anyway, the ( Read more... )

I guess the reason I was specifically invited to the retirement party last night was because one of the partners at the firm was uncomfortable with hiring Nathan's girlfriend. You know, I really could have completely dealt with it, and was dealing with it until Nathan came home and proclaimed that I didn't get hired because of my relationship with ( Read more... )

It's been quite sometime since I posted, and I'm not terribly sure I would like to rehash everything that is happening. I'm moving forward in life, I'm gainfully employed. Kind of. Good enough, anyway. I've taken to mixing my drinks in the blender. With frozen strawberries ( Read more... )

Interviewed for a temp job this afternoon. Start tomorrow at 6:00am. Pretty snazzy, get to work on ferry boats and talk to strangers. Totally not the kind of job I was aiming for, but it's only a couple weeks, and it still brings in monies. but, did I mention, I need to be awake in four and a half hours and I totally can't sleep. I'd been doing ( Read more... )

I am sick. *coughcough*

Ok. I don't know how many people read this anymore, but I need help ( Read more... )

$275 repair on my Macbook to replace keyboard, trackpad, and power fuse. Symptoms being unresponsive keyboard and mouse and intermittently restarting without being touched. Uncommon repair for my computer. New keys and palm rest make it feel strange to type. Glad I got the 3-year warranty on my laptop, totally didn't realize I had. Awesome, though ( Read more... )