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At the end of the day.
I will never be your priority.
But who am I to ask? I'm just your wife, and not your mother because she has all the control in our family.
Soon you will be gone, reaching out your future without us, our son and I.
And it will be real life disaster and never ending pain for me.
Until I don't know when.
Maybe until I take my last breath. -
Never-ending pain.
Seiring saya bertumbuh, saya mengenal dan belajar bahwa ekspektasi adalah hal yang paling mengerikan (besides feeling lonely ( Read more... ) -
Human and their feelings, such an disappointment.
Aku dulu pernah berfikir betapa beruntungnya aku, walau sejak kecil aku tidak mendapatkan semua hal yang aku inginkan namun aku merasa cukup ( Read more... ) -
At my lowest point.
Rasanya sudah lama sekali sejak aku merasa menjadi diri sendiri ( Read more... ) -
Read this again and again.
You are enough. -
Living a new life.
It’s been two months since I married the love of my life.
In two months I learned a lot (and will keep learning until God knows when), I carry my baby now, learning how to be a good mother in this such an a young age. But Im happy and can not wait to meet and raise my baby, spending many times together.
But other than that, Im dealing with new ( Read more... ) -
This fake-happiness.
I think, I’m starting to loving this kind of fake-happiness, I mean I’m getting used of reading a lot, watching a bunch of movies and talking much to avoid the chaos on my head.
You know, you wear a mask for so long, that you forget who you were beneath it.
A wreck, and in pain.
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God, just take me.
I dont think I can recover after this.
You bring me that traumatic memories again and again.
Im so sick of feeling unworthy and lacking of everything.
I gave you the best, but it’s always not enough.
For years, you put my life in hell.
I never wanted to born this way, if you don’t want me to be a part of your family then why you decide to give a birth ( Read more... ) -
2021.
I won’t talk so much about 2021.
It reminds me about lots of bad memories.
2021 was the only one year that I wish I could skip, throughout my existence.
I can pass all the problem, but one thing that will never get me recover from the trauma.
I learn so much, but the hardest came at the very last day of 2021.
I lost not only one soul, but two.
Talking ( Read more... ) -
I wish.
I wish I was never born.
I wish I never had my first breath.
There should really just be an off button.