So, I really haven't posted in awhile and frankly I was just thinking about deleting this whole thing completely, it's just full of garbage and things I wish I never did/said. But I guess we should embrace that of which makes us strange and delusional. Most of this journal takes place in a desperate time in my life where I sought acceptance and ( Read more... )

Must be nice living with barely and responsibilities. Waking up at 6 at night
or not even going to bed in the first place. Or sleep all day and complain that
you're still tired. While I have to wake up regardless, go to work for shit, then
go to school sometimes but I still manage to make time for other things. I don't
get people.

Why don't I get to ( Read more... )

Go ahead and neglect me. Lie to me all you want. Cheat on me, because while you're
doing that, there's some other guy who's going to pay attention to me. And you'll lose
out on something special. I'm not easy to love but I am lovable. I have a lot of love in me
to give. And my love is deserving of.

My psych always says, "You're not crazy, an insane person doesn't question their sanity ( Read more... )

Its sad when the only person I know I could trust 100%
lives all the way in England and we'll never be friends.
I know I can always count on Kield, I know he'd do anything for me.
I could rely on him. He makes his feelings clear, there's no games
and I know exactly how he feels about me. There's no bullshit.

I'm done I'm so fucking done with people with everything.
I don't even want to be in a relationship anymore half the time
cause it fucking sucks cause I always put more effort into it than
he does. Just forget it. Forget everyone. Forget me since I am
so easy to forget. I'm done.

yup. never good enough. ahh well that's not surprising.

Okay ( Read more... )

I just keep on thinking maybe if I was prettier ( Read more... )

She keeps on asking, "do you think it hurts much to die?"
Well it's hurting so much more to stay alive, now.
She's gonna find out how much it hurts to die.
She laced her perfume up with death--Feel it in my lungs,
So I'll pull in the deepest breath and drop my head.