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Stress = Lower Emotional Capacity
Today was ungodly stressful at work. And due to that, my emotions were all over the place ( Read more... ) -
Dream
Well, shit.
I dreamed that Ian & I and a couple friends of ours (and their kid) were on a vacation. He & I were being flirty & fun, and I was going to join him in the shower. He said something about disappointing me and I remembered a dream I'd had that he had died by suicide. As I went to join him, he got out, and I decided not to say, "No, I have ( Read more... ) -
Not improving as much as it seems
I have grown more quiet about my grief. In part because I'm saving things to post to the new blog. In bigger part because I'm starting to get tired of hearing my own sadness all the time.
If I'm sick of it, how can anyone else not be?
So I get more quiet, and try to only post things that are important or uplifting. I'm not hiding how I am, and if ( Read more... ) -
Holding to Hope
I've been semi quiet for the last couple days. (I know, it doesn't seem like it, does it?)
That's for two reasons... First, I've been in a bit of a holding pattern. No progress to speak of, but no new setbacks. I have good moments and bad... And most are kind of just there, overshadowed by the sadness.
The second reason is that I've been hosting my ( Read more... ) -
End of Life
I think I just dreamt my end of life plan. After I retire, I'm going to have a series of younger foreign lovers, with whom I'll explore the world.
Sounds perfect to me.... :-)
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My Experience With Depression (AKA The Insidious Little Beast)
Most, if not all of the descriptions I see of someone's experience with depression are major depression... Where they lose functionality, they contemplate suicide, their lives tailspin.
This has not been my experience.
I suffer from depression. There's no doubt of that. Yet mine is low grade. Insidious. Sneaky. Subtle.
My brand of depression is called ( Read more... ) -
Guns
Ok, so here's the thing.
If you honestly believe that the government is out to take away your freedom by taking away your guns, and that guns will save you from the omgsocialistgovernment, then you are not only delusional, but you're kind of stupid.
If the government wants to take away your freedom, they'll do it by taking your privacy.
They'll do it ( Read more... ) -
Dreams
My night started with dreams that left me feeling lonely, sad, frustrated, and generally not ok.
It ended with sex dreams wherein a random (very handsome) door to door salesman and I got it on. A lot.
Brain may need some downtime too...
