Okay today mildly sucks. I got up at 8 in the morning so see austin. Well I ended up having to wait till 9 to get a ride which was annoying. Then hung out with Austins mom Val which is fun cause I love her like the mom that wasn't a bitch. Then I get to Austin's and go to hug him and be all loving. Well I went to bed at 4am and got up at 8. It's ( Read more... )

Who's going to horror fest. Becky, Britney, Joel, Autin and I are going. Then we are going to freck our selves out even more by grave dancing. Then back to Beckies house to play killer. WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

I feel no regrets. Suposdly it's a patern from people with anti-socail personality disoder. It's a part of my "illness" I can't feel regret or remorse. I can't feel bad for what I did. I can't mental process that something is wrong. Most people with anti-social personality disorder are killers. it affects less than .1% of the population. Oddly ( Read more... )

I will not cry anymore. My father has told me to my face that he hates and that we will never have any form of a realtionship. He told me that he can't stand to look at me, pass me in the halls, or even have the knowledge that I am in his house. This is my reason for writing. I never thought that this would happen. That the people who are supost to ( Read more... )

Last night Julian, Joel, Daniel, CC, Blondie, Austin n I went to knotts scary farm. This has proven to me 3 things. One even if u know something is there, point at it, turn to CC n tell her it's there. When it jumps out you will screa like a lil girl and jump into cute poses. (Yes i watch to much anime.) Another is being dropped from high places is ( Read more... )

For a long time I felt like I was in a very dark place. I still sometimes go there. It feels hopeless and depressing. It's what therepist call fatty acid defience. It is from all of my recent surgies and illnesses. My body is so focoused on healing all of my wounds and illnessed that it forgets about my immune system and my chemistry gets all ( Read more... )

I get to go to school tomarrow. Normally thats not a good thing but I have been away from school and alot of my friends for over a week. I need people, I need my friends. I am wayy to bored all alone here in my house. I feel a bit odd lately like something is off in my life. I wonder what it could be??

Today I spent a few hours outside breathing in the fresh air. Basically I have been in my room either in my house or hospital. Today I got to have alot of fresh air. It made my lungs feel soo nice. I thought alot about my life. I feel like I wanna try to try some new fashions. I started looking at Baby the stars shine bright. I love it sooo much. I ( Read more... )

So I am out of the hospital. Life is probly going to go back to normal. Well my twisted version of normal but it's my version LOL. I am hoping to go to the mall n dinner n friday. I hope that alot of my friends can come. I am also hoping to get my hair cut on friday.


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Well I have no idea who reads this still so I think no one will care if I write stuff. Well my life is good right now. I got a good man in my life we're gonna get married. I am gonna be a teacher. It should be exciting. I mean I know I am going to love my life it just seems so different that from what I wanted. Where did my exciting life full of ( Read more... )