"What if?"

I can't think of anything that I am 100% happy about in my life. It's a little discouraging.

It's been a while...but it's back. That feeling like I have/am some disease. I don't feel well. People seem to avoid me. It's nice, but it sucks at the same time.

I don't get why I am not good enough. I listen to all of you and I'm there for when you need someone. Then, when the coast is clear, you high-tail it to another guy. I feel like a stepping stone. Thanks for using me; I love it. One day you all will regret this.

Would anyone like to remind me why I keep shooting for romance?

or

Why is it when I type, I leave complete words out of sentences?

I don't know what you did with my heart, but I want it back. I don't want these feelings anymore. I want rest. I don't want you dead, but I could deal with not having to even think about you.
Look what you've done...
Stare me in the eyes with your teeth on the curb.

All I want is to feel important and make a difference. I won't do much of that in this room on this computer.
All I want is to feel loved and blessed. I won't get much of that if I don't spend much time with God.
All I want is to feel worthy. Pssssssssssh.

HERE THEY ARE!

Dear Lizabeth (Drama starring Randy Hiner and Allison Cooney)
Bens Goes to Veganville (Comedy starring Ben Howard)
100 Megs of Pure Destruction (Action Comedy starring Tim Neff)

So I definately opened for The Good Life tonight and they were amazing as musicians and people. I saw many familiar faces that brought a smile to my face and then some. I saw two friends tonight being extremely happy and that gave me a sense of peace. I don't know how, but it did. I, however, am still in that search mode...and questioning if I'm ( Read more... )

I am thinking that I will get my associates in graphic design, rather than a bachelor's degree. Then, I'm either heading to a recording workshop with Jake or hitting the road right out of college. I want to at least try living every musician's dream, and if it doesn't work out I'm coming back to Indiana to settle down. It has some kinks to get ( Read more... )