[voice--attempted filter away from Jilly Coppercorn, Elizabeth Swann, Cordelia Chase, Nami, and Buffy Summers. Jack is not so very clever at filters.]
HOla: Captain Jack Sparrow, here, with an opportunity for all you crafty nimblefingered types out there. Perchance do any of you know the fine art of poppetry? I need five devilishly attractive and
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good luck finding it, jack.
you have seven minutes before buffy gets home. ]
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There wasn't time to do this neatly; she could be home, soon.
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Firstly -- a dangerously festive and cheery looking box with a To: Jack tag on it. Ripe for the wholly unethical pre-unwrapping well before Christmas Day. Under the bed.
Secondly -- a certain worn-only-once festival costume dress hidden behind a heavy nearly-as-rarely-worn parka in the closet.
Thirdly -- no portrait.
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A PRESSIE. FOR MYSELF.
Yeah; that probably killed some time right there, along with the sensual stroking of one discarded leather dress. At least it momentarily distracted him from the portrait.
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[But on a more important note!]
There was an ice skating rink last year?
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And aye again--the skating rink from last year was a thing of beauty. Delicate, shimmering, cold brittle beauty.
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Sounds like a nice thing. I wonder if the lake freezes enough to skate on?
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And she might tell Buffy.
Don't tell Buffy.
[He clears his throat before continuing on:] You want to watch yourself on the lakes. Bits DO freeze up solid, but it's best to test it first.
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[Meet someone who can make you an ice rink.]
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Aye, lass--but the lakes are over a two-hour-trek away. Toes freeze off, poor little children turn blue and freeze solid. Much more better to have one close to the village, isn't it.
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[This is right up his alley.]
Body pillows are better.
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Body pillows are elongated pillows generally used to correct body posture, but more often used because they can have the image and size of a person while being decorated with said person's likeness.
They are extremely popular in my country.
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[Every time you do not believe, Vash, a fairy falls down dead.]
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Hrrrrrrrrrm dunno. Cirno was rather stupid, as fairies go.
[He'd had to run into a freezing ocean to rescue her from a starfish, once.]
More like a partnership.
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