Despite human delusions of higher powers, creators, messiahs, all of us are nothing more than big sacks of chemicals. This means that nothing we feel is real, and therefore our suffering is irrelevant. There's something incredibly comforting about this to me.

I've made the decision to leave South America a week early in order to take part in the American Idol auditions at Key Arena on the 19th of September. Brian's not very happy about it. My mom is surprisingly quite supportive. (the first time I mentioned I'd like to audition for the show, she told me I had no chance because "there are all these kids ( Read more... )

Love and hatred sure are remarkably close emotions, and have not yet been mutually exclusive for me.

I've given it some thought, and here are (in no particular order) my all time top 5 CDs. I highly recommend everyone who's interested ask me for a burned copy of any of them, because all of them make me lose my shit every time I hear them ( Read more... )

It sure would be nice for once to have a positive experience with a love interest. It's not happened once.

I realize now that what makes people fall in love is not some grand cosmic motive, but a deeply rooted kinship because of something the two share in common. Sometimes it's doing something to keep from hurting someone you care about at the expense of one's own happiness. I'd like to learn to stop doing it, honestly.

The more I think about it, the more it makes sense. The wiry limbs, long fingers, large ears... the dark eyebrows, tapered features, and nose that lends a sense of the avian without being ugly. I AM a villain. Mine is not the role of the noble man. I destroy. I create through the chaos that swirls inside of me. Plus, you should see my war face ( Read more... )

I am listening to my copy of "For Lovers Only: The Romantic Pavarotti" and I have not laughed this hard in a long time. The CD as a whole seems to be composed mainly of songs by producers which were written and orchestrated to sound like arias or italian art song. There was one track, though, which made me lose my shit laughing.

Problem ( Read more... )

Doing the right thing is occasionally really painful. A big fault that a lot of people have is their idealism about fate and how when they finally get something good in their life it must be theirs, and reason cannot be permitted to stand in their way. But reason needs to be the most important thing to us because without it we're animals. But the ( Read more... )