dear CCS, sometimes i hate the fact that you want your students to be deprived of sleep and things of the like. thankfully we're taking a break from our relationship very soon.

i am somewhat nervous as of right now. over break i am meeting some new people and i don't know, i never have met them before and i just really somewhat want to be liked by a group of friends. its nervwrecking sometimes. cause a lot of people in my life have been like oh yeah you're a good dude, but they never wanna hang out or call or talk to me. ( Read more... )

today is gonna be 24 hour lab night at school. i am bringing pajamas a house coat AKA a robe, my macbook some dvds and food. so while i print i can finally finally finish the tv show Extras. i am way too excited. which is weird cause i never thought i'd be excited about doing that. its probley cause my best friend will probley be there tonight.

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tonight was one of those nights where i realized how my old friends have changed. i hung out with them and i just realized that i am totally oppisite of them. i mean some of them have stayed the same, but others i don't know how to describe it other than were just different. and not to say thats a bad thing i believe you should be an individual. ( Read more... )

i just finished planning a shoot for tommrow. so since i've been saying lately i've been remembering that girl i loved, i figure why not make art out of it. you see i am the kind of cat that loves to photograph his life expereinces. wether they were great or painful. happy. sad. so what i have learned is this, i want to fall in love again i really ( Read more... )

coming in very nicely. if i may say so myself. this is in its close to two weeks stage. now that i have photobooth again on my mac i can share with you its lovely stages. for a while photobooth decided to dissappear.


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this break is devoted to relaxing, starting tommrow i can. also i've determined to try and heal past wounds cause theres so many that have yet to be healed. and i've just really decided to take the advice of Jesus in the bible, i remeber he quotes Isaiah in Luke when hes quoting him at a Sabbath and it basically says you know i've come to set the ( Read more... )

i really hate this time of year. i am constantly reminded of my own loneliness and it really sucks. everywhere i go i am reminded of beauty and love, and i haven't found that in years. yes i have found God's love. thats amazing believe me, but i still yearn for a woman to love me, and me to love her. i thought i probley would've found love again by ( Read more... )

i never really think about it, but this year always feels weird to me. cause it was around this year i was dumped in high school by a girl i really did love. it wasn't one of those relationships that was like a stupid petty romance, i really did love her. a lot. and its like almost 4 or 5 years now and you're not over it matt? c'mon. but its hard. ( Read more... )