Pulsatilla | Chapter 8/? [Part One]

[love_cassiopeia]

Pulsatilla
Author: love_cassiopeia
Summary: A complete mess was what Jung Yunho became after his beloved wife’s death. Trapped in a permanent state of isolation and loneliness, Yunho summons his knowledge on biology in hopes of recreating his wife in the form of an artificial human. However, the experiment goes terribly wrong and instead creates a male who has all his wife’s looks and qualities, one who he eventually decides to name ‘Jaejoong.’ Coping with the idyllic memories Jaejoong brings back of his wife, Yunho tries his best not to fall in love with his creation, knowing that the love he brings along is not the real thing-or is it?
Rated: PG-13 - NC-17
Warning(s): NC-17 material, language
Genre: Romance/Angst
Pairing(s): YunJae
Chapter 8: Pesanteur (Part One)

Definition: The Pulsatilla is a deciduous perennial flower native to Europe and Asia that grows in the leftover nutrients of a dead plant. It is usually grown to replace another plant. It is capable of curing diseases and may be used in remedies.

[Please leave your comments on part 2 of the chapter. I've disabled the comments on part 1]




P e s a n t e u r

*

As the inviting sunlight pierced through the sheer curtains that morning, Yunho felt an irregular ache lurk somewhere along the lower portion of his back. Opening his eyes only slightly, trying to distinguish his surroundings, he slowly began to discover that his head was rested peacefully within Jaejoong’s lap-which he could’ve easily mistaken for a pillow. Understanding that he had not caught the sight of a bed the entire night, Yunho could easily put his finger on the reason why his back was aching so obscurely. Seeing the boy beside him with his eyes closed and a soft smile on his lips however, nearly made all the pain disappear.

It didn’t take long before his mind started replaying the foolish yet riveting occurrences of the previous night. Although he had craved Jaejoong unquestionably at the time, there was no doubt that a part of him still constantly looked at the kiss in absolute fear. It wasn’t as if he was disgusted by Jaejoong (he liked to think he was in the beginning, but clearly, everything was different now), it was more as if he was frightened at the outcomes of meeting his lips with the boy’s. No matter how much a persistent part of him denied it, he knew deep down that Jaejoong wasn’t human. In fact, due to the apparent mistake he made in trying to recreate his wife, Yunho really had no idea what Jaejoong was. In regards to that, the same question continuously kept returning to him: was it worth it, giving Jaejoong his love when he wasn’t even human to begin with?

Even after twenty-six years of enduring this strange thing called life, Yunho still had no clue how love could be brought out so easily from a person. In high school, love was a come-and-go event, not meant to be taken seriously. In college, it became a need-a need to become like everybody else, that is. Nonetheless, after he met Seulki, love seemed like everything it wasn’t. For the first time, Yunho learned to cherish love without any disruptions from the outside world.

And that love… he wanted to say that it was what he had created last night with Jaejoong. He hoped that somewhere, within some corner of Jaejoong's heart, the same emotion existed.

Awoken by Yunho’s constant shifting in his lap, Jaejoong opened up his eyes and let the pungent sunshine hit his dark pupils. “Yunho…?” He uttered. “You're already awake?”

Completely conscious and full of energy, Yunho leaped off Jaejoong’s lap and claimed a seat on the seat beside him. “Awake and at your service!” Yunho strung the words together cheekily, trying to bring a smile to Jaejoong’s lips.

“Shouldn't you be leaving for work at this hour?” The raven-haired boy questioned. “You’re far past schedule. I’m sorry… I should’ve woken you up earlier.”

Yunho shook his head. “No need to apologize.” Nothing hurt more than having to hear Jaejoong’s constant apologies. “In fact, I don’t plan on going to work today.” He announced, instantly bringing a look of bafflement onto Jaejoong’s attractive countenance.

“Why don’t we set aside this day for ourselves? Besides, I didn’t receive that damn project anyway… there’s not much for me to do at work even if I decide to show up.”

“Are you sure?” Jaejoong looked tentative. “I mean… will your boss be okay with that?”

Yunho chuckled and ran his fingers through Jaejoong’s midnight-black hair, making him shiver. “My boss is the last person on my mind right now.” Yunho spoke sleazily, hypnotized by the sensation of having Jaejoong pressed so close to him. “And besides, we've been running low nowadays on quality time with each other. No need to deprive ourselves.”

Jaejoong felt a blush creep onto his cheeks as Yunho’s words evaporated into the air. “Well…” He trailed off. “We have a full twenty-four hours in our palms, what should we do?”

“I've got it!” Yunho burst out exuberantly. “Why don’t you teach me how to cook? I want to be the one to do all the cooking today!”

Jaejoong sighed and rolled his eyes mockingly. “Yunho… you know that cooking is not exactly something you learn in one day.” He clarified. “It takes experience.”

Yeah, right, Yunho wanted to say. It took you, what… a minute, to learn how to cook and play the piano? “How about we make breakfast together then?” He suggested. “I mean… you can just tell me what to do to assist you and I’ll do it.”

“That sounds relatively promising.” Jaejoong considered. “And besides… I’m starving!”

Yunho nodded in agreement. “Let’s get started then!”

“You should at least take a shower first.” Jaejoong pointed out. “You came back from a bar, for goodness' sake. You smell of alcohol and cigarettes, if you haven't noticed already.”

The scientist put his creation’s words into consideration and took a sniff at himself. Jaejoong was correct, he smelled horrible. Feeling a bit embarrassed by his masculine flaws, Yunho excused himself from the living room and entered the bathroom with a fresh, ivory-white towel draped over his shoulders. Meanwhile, Jaejoong travelled to the kitchen where he fetched various ingredients from the fridge, preparing them for cooking as Yunho stepped into the shower.

Shutting the door behind him and stripping the dirty clothes off his muscular body, Yunho decided to take a long gaze at his figure within the mirror. To his surprise, his appearance seemed a lot healthier than before Jaejoong stepped into his life. For the first time in months, he couldn’t see the clear contours of his bones protruding evidently beneath his skin. He smiled at the fact and looked over his complexion, discovering that there were no longer any dark circles under his eyes. Ignoring the alcohol he drank last night, Yunho could declare the fact that he was currently in perfect health and physique.

He shook his head, realizing just how ridiculous he was for his attempt at binge drinking last night. It was the first evening where he had failed to return home in time for dinner in a whole two months, and he couldn’t deny that it had certainly taken its toll on him, being without Jaejoong for a mere four hours. It was as if without his lover, he had a hard time keeping himself in proper hygiene and shape.

Sighing languidly, he stepped into the shower and switched on the running water. He let the warm liquid scatter over him like droplets of rain, trying to relish the warm sensation of the steam that submerged him. Within seconds, Yunho’s mind viscerally wandered to an area that caused his heart to beat abnormally. For the first time in a while, the scientist didn’t want to be the only one in the shower.

He felt that with someone accompanying him-pressing his supple body against his-the sensation would feel more complete. He had no idea where the sudden desire came from, but he knew that it was far too engaging to ignore.

It had been quite a long time since someone had the resolve to invoke such a part of him that only existed when his member began to harden-a sign that he couldn’t keep his emotions bottled up any longer. Even after a couple of months of having Jaejoong reside in his penthouse, he couldn’t dig up the courage to tell himself that he felt absolutely breathless in his presence; that he wanted to taste every inch of his lithe body that stood in the atmosphere like a piece of rich velvet. He wanted to imagine how it felt to be within him, to imagine how his melodious voice would react to the painful pleasure. But alas, Yunho felt a tad disgusted, discovering just how desperate and downright stupid he sounded.

After nearly getting a boner from letting his mind glide over such thoughts, Yunho dried himself off with the white towel, wrapping the fabric across his waist in haste. His original motive upon stepping out of the shower was to ransack his drawers and closet for a clean change of clothes. As allured as he was by Jaejoong however, Yunho decided to skip the process altogether and entered the kitchen solely with a towel wrapped around his waist.

Jaejoong, without surprise, was trying to prepare a few vegetables by slicing them attentively on a wooden chopping board. As he sliced through the mushrooms, he could feel a muscular yet sleek arm wrap itself around his accentuated waist. He could feel a particular someone’s breath hotly sink into his nape, causing a chill to run up his spine. As lurid as the sensation was, Jaejoong felt a certain desire emerge from within him as every part of him screamed in passion. Dropping the knife immediately (he was flabbergasted, but had no intention of hurting anybody), he turned around swiftly, only to come face to face with a shirtless, captivating, hair-soaked-with-water, Yunho.

“Y-Yunho…” Jaejoong uttered fretfully. “Don’t scare me like that!”

Choosing to disregard Jaejoong’s words, Yunho nailed his creation to the counter, letting his hands snake up to his cheekbones. Bringing himself even closer, the scientist confidently left a chaste kiss on the silky lips that lay openly before him. Jaejoong’s body instantly tensed up against his, but soon relaxed as the kiss carried on. Although Yunho wanted to impel his actions to go further, he momentarily decided against it as the night Jaejoong lost his virginity resurfaced in his mind. He sighed as he pulled away, feeling a bit farcical that he had let his selfishness control himself so early in the morning.

“What was that?” Jaejoong questioned sarcastically. “Didn’t you get enough last night?”

Yunho corresponded Jaejoong’s remark with a witty reply of his own. “Why are you being so difficult, Jaejoong-ah?” He teased. “Can’t a man just take the time to admire his creation once in a while?”

“That's not called admiring. And even if it was, I'm not an item placed openly before you to satisfy your needs.” Jaejoong argued. “Just because I’m made by you doesn’t necessarily mean that you can do whatever the hell you want with me.”

The scientist was dumbfounded by Jaejoong’s feisty yet laconic set of words. Just a month ago, when he was first born, he spoke and acted quite like a gentleman. Now, he was acting like nothing but a spoiled child.

“My God, Jaejoong.” Yunho burst out without wavering. “When did your words suddenly become so aggressive?”

The boy shrugged in return. “I’ve learned from the best.” He eyed Yunho down until the taller man could feel a chill run up his spine. It all started to make sense now… Jaejoong had seen too much of his childish behaviour (whether it was spurning vegetables or refusing to sleep).

Deciding to change the subject rapidly, Jaejoong pointed over to a pile of neatly folded clothing that sat upon a nearby counter. “Those are your clothes.” Jaejoong indicated. “I knew you would come running out of the shower with no clue where your clothes were. So I prepared them for you here.”

Just how predictable am I? Yunho asked himself. Giving Jaejoong a slight nod of gratitude, the scientist changed into the casual pair of t-shirt and shorts and re-entered the kitchen in hopes of creating a scrumptious breakfast with the eye-catching boy that stood before him with a permanent smile.

“Well, where should we start?” Yunho questioned, looking around the kitchen in confusion. There was a wide selection of vegetables and fruits stationed upon the counters along with a few eggs and a package of bacon.

“You could first help me by beating those eggs together.” Jaejoong directed. “While you’re at it, I will sauté the vegetables and heat up the skillet for the omelette.”

Yunho nodded, cracking the eggs into a bowl and mixing them with a pair of chopsticks. The word ‘omelette’ sounded unpromising-almost as if it was too fussy and cumbersome to make. Considering he was working with one of the best housewives (househusband, should he say) in Korea, he envisaged that the meal would turn out completely faultless.

As the scientist infused the egg yolks with the whites, he couldn’t help but allow his eyes to absentmindedly meander over to Jaejoong once again. The boy had his wife’s old pink-laced apron around his body, tending diligently to a pan with a spatula, lost in his work. Yunho stared dreamily at him, receiving a dose of déjà vu as he retrogressed to the days Seulki wore the same apron, hovering over the same stove in the same manner. He had almost forgotten his original task at hand of beating the eggs as he found himself lost within his memories once again.

“Yunho?”

It appeared as if someone was calling his name, telling him to return to reality. He chose to ignore the voice, letting the memories fill up every single unfilled gap in his mind.

“Yunho!”

The sudden cry of his name was strong enough to bring him back to the desolate palms of reality. Realizing that he was beating the eggs uncontrollably and staring profoundly into thin air, Yunho snapped out of his thoughts and focused his attention once more on the head chef-Jaejoong.

“Aish, Yunho, you’ve overbeaten the eggs!”

Discovering that Jaejoong wasn’t exactly pleased with his performance, Yunho dropped his pair of chopsticks and inspected the eggs he had just beaten. Within the mixture, small bubbles and air pockets had begun to form-a clear indication that he had failed the first task Jaejoong had given him.

“I-I’m sorry, I didn’t realize-”

The head chef chose to ignore his apology straight away without a single grain of sympathy. “You know, cooking is a difficult task that requires a lot of concentration.” He lectured. “And it’s dangerous if you doze off! Especially if you’re standing next to a stove or have a knife in your hands.”

Yunho assimilated Jaejoong’s words one by one and considered that perhaps cooking was much harder than it looked. “What do we do with the eggs, then?” He questioned, indicating to the mixture he had just tended to. “Should I start over?”

“That won’t be necessary.” Jaejoong got a hold of the overbeaten eggs and poured them into piping-hot skillet. “It would be a waste, throwing these eggs away.” He tossed in a few pinches of salt, seasoning the eggs mixture. “Now Yunho, why don’t you flip the egg for me?”

Understanding that the egg mixture in the pan wasn’t going to stay liquid for long, Yunho grasped onto the handle of the skillet and prepared to flip over the layer of solidified egg before the heat burnt it all the way to breakfast-hell. Noticing that Jaejoong was preoccupied with the vegetables, he decided to flip the egg without assistance or consent-even though he was absolutely clueless on how to approach it.

Oops, wrong move.

After he lifted the light skillet and attempted to flip over the egg, Yunho discovered that the egg mixture was no longer situated within the pan. Yunho looked into the non-stick skillet in surprise, wondering where in the word the foundation of the omelette had gone. Probing his surroundings by looking to his left and right, Yunho was struck with the discovery that the egg mixture was nowhere in sight. Having no choice but to improvise, Yunho looked up at the ceiling-baffled by what he saw.

To his astonishment, he had brandished the pan too roughly, making the round egg mixture soar into the air, sticking persistently onto the once-pristine kitchen ceiling. Mortified by what he had done, Yunho had no idea how to approach the clean-up the scenario called for.

“Uh… Jaejoong?”

“Did you flip the egg over, Yunho?”

“Actually…” He trailed off, afraid that he would disappoint the head chef with his mistake (he felt ridiculous, considering they weren’t in an opulent kitchen, and that he obviously wasn't working for Jaejoong-but he wanted to impress him nonetheless). “I didn’t do this intentionally, but… look at the ceiling.”

Following Yunho’s command, Jaejoong gazed up at the layer of egg, now adherent to the white ceiling. “Oh Yunho.” He chuckled aloud, almost like a five year old making fun of another. “Maybe you should find a newspaper to read while I complete the breakfast myself…”

In return, the mad scientist felt embarrassed that he had disappointed the ebony-haired beauty. “Argh, I’m so sorry Jae. Man, cooking is really harder than I expected!” He announced. “I feel so idiotic, ruining your meal like this.”

Almost like a close friend or a brother, Jaejoong wrapped his arm amiably around Yunho’s broad shoulders. “Don’t worry about it.” Jaejoong solaced. “We all have our own separate roles in this household. I should be grateful enough to have you out there, earning the money for us. I shouldn’t have asked you to assist me at all.”

Yunho looked rather worried. “B-but… it was I who offered to help!”

Jaejoong let a soft giggle escaped his cherry-coloured lips. “Oh Yunho…” He uttered. “If you’re anticipating a well-cooked breakfast without anything being burnt or in your case-glued to the ceiling-then please sit back, relax, and let me do the work.” Jaejoong insisted. “Now… let me get a chair and get that piece of egg off the ceiling.”

A smile slowly formed on Yunho’s lips as such engaging words strolled out of his creation’s mouth. Yunho couldn’t deny it-there was a certain hint of authority in his voice, one which matched the image of a feisty yet kind-hearted wife. Hearing him say such words and feeling him tease him so mechanically, Yunho began to understand how much his creation’s spirit had changed. From the very beginning, Yunho felt that the boy was lost, afraid to utter even the simplest of words. Now, as he spent more time on earth after the cherished experiences, Yunho could feel him becoming more and more like an actual human.

Yunho watched his partner attentively as he pulled a chair into the kitchen, standing atop of it with his adorably tippy-toes as he attempted to rid the ceiling of the sticky sheet of egg. However, as Jaejoong finally retrieved the egg and had it placed securely in his hand, his body began to falter, and then ultimately, began to tumble down from his stance on the chair.

Terrified by the scene occurring before him, Yunho immediately rushed over to the side of the chair, hoping he would prevent Jaejoong from falling. He was too late however, when Jaejoong plummeted from an unstable stance on the wobbly chair, marking the marble floor as his target.

“Jaejoong, be carefu-” Within a split second, Yunho brought himself beside Jaejoong, catching the falling boy swiftly in his muscular arms. As Jaejoong finally opened his eyes and comprehended he had been saved, he didn’t hesitate to give his saviour one of the biggest grins he had seen his entire life.

The scientist and his experiment stared into each other’s eyes deeply, almost as if the two was searching around for something. Although the height of the fall wasn’t of extreme magnitude, Jaejoong felt he had been a damsel in distress yet again, saved by a prince charming that happened to ride by. He detested the title he gave himself, but was nevertheless fortunate that he had been saved by the man he had treasured and looked up to from the day of his birth.

“Are you all right?” After a while, the sound of Yunho’s voice was finally able to penetrate the foggy reverie in his mind. “Next time, when you need to do something like that, please just ask me. We wouldn’t want to see you getting hurt on your own when I’m not at home, now would we?”

Jaejoong lifted himself out of Yunho’s muscular arms and realigned his stance. “Thank you.” He declared. “I should’ve known, seeing how clumsy and foolish I always am."

“Jae, that’s no way a head chef speaks about himself!”

“Who said I was a head chef?”

Refreshing his memory, Yunho slowly began to recognize that it was he himself who had pictured Jaejoong as a meticulous head chef of a five-star restaurant who told him what to do, controlling him around the kitchen as if he was his boss. Feeling relieved that the innocent, gentle side of Jaejoong still remained, Yunho shook his head and chose to ignore the matter altogether.

“Now Yunho, why don’t you just sit at the table and read the newspaper or something?” Jaejoong suggested, trying to move Yunho as far from the stove as possible. “Breakfast will be ready in a matter of minutes.”

“Are you sure?” The taller male asked, still doubtful of Jaejoong’s intentions. “I mean, you’ll be able to manage this all by yourself, right?”

His features beaming with confidence, Jaejoong left his creator a gentle kiss on the nose, emphasizing the fact that there was no need for more discussion. “I’ll manage. Besides, I’ve been through this cooking routine a dozen times before.” He clarified. “What made you so eager to help me today anyways?”

Yunho languidly rested his slender body onto a chair alongside the dining table. “It’s just so… touching, seeing you do this everyday.” Although the words were rather melodramatic, Yunho had no control whatsoever as they automatically slipped from his mouth. “And considering I haven’t done much to repay you for your cooking and just taking care of me in general, I feel rather guilty.”

Oh, you’ve rewarded me quite abundantly, actually, a part of Jaejoong wanted to announce. From the smile on your face to those passionate kisses you gave me last night, I think I’ve received all that I wanted and more.

Oh yes, Yunho definitely had been smiling a lot more than before-when he first created him.

Shaking the much too frank answer out of his mind, Jaejoong searched through his thoughts for a more down to earth, mundane answer. “Nonsense.” He uttered, cracking a new set of eggs into a bowl. “You’ve taken me shopping, to Junsu’s shop to play the piano… you even ditched out on work to go to that concert days ago. Out of all these, how can you say that you feel guilty for not providing me with enough?”

“You’re rather easy to impress, Jaejoong.” Yunho indicated, resting his elbows casually on the dining table. “Those things-they were the least I could do. Surely taking you out on a shopping trip is not as difficult as having to cook and assemble every meal all the while coping with the dirty laundry and dusty apartment.”

Jaejoong dropped the egg mixture into the skillet-repeating Yunho’s procedures but with deftness-and then did a perfect flip that was marvellous to Yunho’s eyes but made him feel utterly abased. “But the thing is… I love doing all this. And in the end, I think that it’s all that really matters."

It had never occurred to Yunho that such a beautiful, compassionate boy would actually have been made in a lab as a failed experiment. As the words strolled from one person to another, Yunho could feel the vague sensation that he was talking to another actual human being-to a person he could easily get along with and spend the rest of his life with. Within their deep conversation, Yunho could’ve sworn that Jaejoong looked overjoyed as well, being able to surpass all the fears and to talk to him directly with no insecurity whatsoever.

“Just know that I’m here for you.” Yunho spoke up after a short pause. “If you ever need a hand with cleaning, laundry, cooking-you name it-don’t be afraid to ask me.”

Jaejoong smirked with pleasure. “Thank you.” He declared. It felt rather eccentric for the boy, having someone to look after him with no complaints (especially considering the man was one of the best looking men he had seen his entire life who had initially abandoned him at a nightclub once-refusing to take upon the responsibility). But he had to admit it: everything was different now.

After reading a few articles in the latest edition of the Seoul Times, Yunho looked up in awe to see that the lavish breakfast had been finally completed. Jaejoong carried over two plates filled with a scrumptious-looking serving of a western-style omelette. Along with the omelette came two glasses of orange juice, a few traditional Korean appetizers, and a platter of pineapples Jaejoong had previously cut up.

Speechless, Yunho didn’t know whether to feel hungry or to feel completely overwhelmed by what was placed before him. “Jaejoong… you didn’t have to prepare this much!” Nevertheless, the tone of his voice sounded more like a ‘thank you’ than a complaint.

Taking his apron off and hanging it onto a nearby hook, Jaejoong took the seat across from Yunho and seized the chopsticks. “I reckoned that it would be wise to provide you with a proper breakfast this morning since you’re not planning to go to work.” He explained. “You’re always rushing out the door so quickly in the morning, it’s hard to shove any decent food down your throat as you’re reaching for your briefcase and fixing your tie.”

Yunho chuckled aloud, knowing that Jaejoong had finally grasped onto his rightful opportunity. “Well, I’m all yours today!” He stated assertively. “Feel free to shove whatever you wish down my throat.”

Hearing Yunho’s affirmation, Jaejoong immediately reached into the plate of pineapples and skewered one onto his fork. Slowly, he brought the piece of fruit to Yunho’s face, wishing he would open up his mouth instead of being persistent and refusing to cooperate. “What about a pineorange?” Jaejoong suggested.

“Jaejoong… for the hundredth time, it’s called a pineapple.”

“What difference does it make?” He frowned as he saw Yunho’s mouth, still remaining stubbornly closed. “Eat it.” He ordered doggedly. “Now.”

Laughing at his request-command-Yunho opened up his mouth and let the raven-haired boy feed him the fresh, tangy, sweet piece of pineapple-or in this case, pineorange.

Looking up at the boy who generously offered him the piece of fruit, Yunho could evidently perceive the fact that he had fallen deeply in love with him.

…not only that, but he could declare the fact that he didn’t love the boy because he was a near-perfect replica of his wife, but that the boy glowed with a unique light; a light that was his own.

He loved Jaejoong for Jaejoong.

…not because of the similarity he had towards Seulki, but because of the memories the two of them had created within the haven that was once an old, dark, unkempt penthouse.

Onto Part 2

Previous Chapters:

R é s u l t a t |  A l i é n é |  D é s o l é |  B a i g n o i r e | M u s i q u e | N o c t u r n e  1 | N o c t u r n e  2 | J a l o u x | P e s a n t e u r  1 | P e s a n t e u r  2

Want more? For a list of chapters and stories, please don’t hesitate to visit my fanfiction archive