I need to get my unhealthy reaction to the last few hours of BSG off my chest I guess. I apologise for bad spelling mistakes and general incoherence in advance. ( Obviously spoilers for the last episode )
Darling, I agree with absolutely everything you've said. The was the worst ending imaginable. I've been bouncing from rage to hurt to deep, deep sadness for two days straight. I don't know if/when it gets better. Telling myself it's just a TV show doesn't seem to help though, b/c it, like RDM' brutal message, just seems to underscore the fact that I feel I've wasted a massive amount of my life on this show. But deep down I know that's just not true. What's true is the fact that we know this show and these characters much, much better than its creator.
Dammit-- I told myself I wasn't going to get started again....
I've been bouncing from rage to hurt to deep, deep sadness for two days straight.
I'm still bouncing, dammit. I'm trapped. Give it a couple of weeks, and this whole fandom will be back writing fics and making up different recovery conclusions - but I feel nauseated even at the simple thought of approaching pilots again: looking at them, diving in them, reading them. What an immortal heritage RDM left indeed.
I think we all have to work through this in our own ways. I spent about three days straight just being filled with rage and eventually just wore myself out. I'm in apathy-land right now, so long as I don't think about it too much
( ... )
I just send hugs. It is really hard right now. It's been two days for me and I still don't know. But let your anger out here, it's what journals are for!
And you know I love your vids. They will be special to me and have gotten me through times of K/L doubt. Not scum at all.
I am absolutely gutted reading your reaction to the finale. (((Mary)) I feel so absolutely horrible for suggesting the 'Life is Beautiful' vid. I would be devastated if you stopped doing something you are so fabulously gifted at. :(
The shippers on skiffy have had very mixed reactions and together most of us have moved past the rage and anger to finding the positive parts of what we saw. My hear is still painfully broken but I am ok with it now. I hope you will be in time as well.
I am absolutely gutted reading your reaction to the finale.
That's why I'm trying to stay away from the fandom and not to drag down other people who are trying to recover rather successfully. *points towards a certain horse rider* You're a sunshine, Jennifer, you shouldn't read my reactions at all because part of me is destroyed completely and it's ugly and inhuman, very much like an infectious disease.
I feel so absolutely horrible for suggesting the 'Life is Beautiful' vid.
Why's that?! The vid is still pretty good, is it not? If anything, it'll be left forever shining as a beacon of futile hope in our past. And now every word of the song's lyrics could be taken literally, it makes even more sense - it's a tracing paper for RDM's finale "message" :D :D :D The meaning is absolutely perverted in its 'straightforwardness' and lack of subtlety but anyone could get it, even a complete blockhead. It serves a great example for many things, depending on who watches it. For me it's a testament of my own tendency toward destructive denial.
Oh, man, Mary, I totally hear and agree with what you're saying. I've certainly never been so upset with a show in my life and hopefully never will again.
But it would be truly a tragedy if you stopped using your remarkable vidding gift. Truly a tragedy. Give yourself a couple of weeks and see how you feel, okay?
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Darling, I agree with absolutely everything you've said. The was the worst ending imaginable. I've been bouncing from rage to hurt to deep, deep sadness for two days straight. I don't know if/when it gets better. Telling myself it's just a TV show doesn't seem to help though, b/c it, like RDM' brutal message, just seems to underscore the fact that I feel I've wasted a massive amount of my life on this show. But deep down I know that's just not true. What's true is the fact that we know this show and these characters much, much better than its creator.
Dammit-- I told myself I wasn't going to get started again....
**sends more hugs**
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I'm still bouncing, dammit. I'm trapped. Give it a couple of weeks, and this whole fandom will be back writing fics and making up different recovery conclusions - but I feel nauseated even at the simple thought of approaching pilots again: looking at them, diving in them, reading them. What an immortal heritage RDM left indeed.
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And you know I love your vids. They will be special to me and have gotten me through times of K/L doubt. Not scum at all.
Do what you need to. We'll be here.
*hugs*
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*big hugs*
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The shippers on skiffy have had very mixed reactions and together most of us have moved past the rage and anger to finding the positive parts of what we saw. My hear is still painfully broken but I am ok with it now. I hope you will be in time as well.
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That's why I'm trying to stay away from the fandom and not to drag down other people who are trying to recover rather successfully. *points towards a certain horse rider* You're a sunshine, Jennifer, you shouldn't read my reactions at all because part of me is destroyed completely and it's ugly and inhuman, very much like an infectious disease.
I feel so absolutely horrible for suggesting the 'Life is Beautiful' vid.
Why's that?! The vid is still pretty good, is it not? If anything, it'll be left forever shining as a beacon of futile hope in our past. And now every word of the song's lyrics could be taken literally, it makes even more sense - it's a tracing paper for RDM's finale "message" :D :D :D The meaning is absolutely perverted in its 'straightforwardness' and lack of subtlety but anyone could get it, even a complete blockhead. It serves a great example for many things, depending on who watches it. For me it's a testament of my own tendency toward destructive denial.
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But it would be truly a tragedy if you stopped using your remarkable vidding gift. Truly a tragedy. Give yourself a couple of weeks and see how you feel, okay?
((Mary))
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How's Jill btw? I haven't seen her on-line since the finale.
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