this is my very last entry i will no longer write in this again....... bye

it will be better i spoke to fran today and told her what is going on between me and rick and she knocked some sense into me i know rick really loves me and i need to stop being so jealous and insecure... we leave for homestead in two weeks... and i hope things are better by then,,

rick swears to me that he is not going anywhere but i keep finding email from that girl but i will be good and hold off and not say another word to him about it .. i called him at 3:00 in the morning just because it was bothering me.. and we talked for about half an hour... well lets see.. if i have to i will write to her,.. and tell her to back ( Read more... )

today i spoke to ethan today and he and rick are talking i am really happy tonight.. rick was saying i can't believe you and my daughter have a journal and i can't read it so i let him read some of what i wrote and he couldn't handle it but i think all is well ... i really what to be a family and i want jess, megan and adam in one house hold ( Read more... )

the only reason i will still go to rick's tonight is for jess ( Read more... )

I know for a fact rick is talking to another women... I won't say how i know but it is true....I don't know how a person can tell you they love you and turn around and tell someone else they miss then and love them and stuff and when his schedule is so that they can talk ( Read more... )

i have a feeling rick is still talking to merc.. but i quess that is something i have to deal with since he says they are friends...

I am not jealous i just don't trust her.. she likes to mess with his head and he falls for it ..

Well jess this is mama dee and i am kind of shocked about what i read... and not to worry my mouth is shut i am just very surpised okay

i love you

well it has been a while and everything is going great ( Read more... )

this will be the last entry i make for a while... until I can get my self together... I don't want jess to dislike me or hate me... and I don't want to push her away the way I did her dad... I think I pushed him away cause I wasn't good enough for him.. I will leave it all alone now and see what shall happen in time... if jess does read this I do ( Read more... )