I wonder how many times we do things just to prove that we can do things. Like staying with a job that sucks just prove that you can keep a job. Or like when my friend Raven grew out her hair just prove to her ex that she could despite the fact that she hates having long hair. Does it doing this ever prove anything beyond the fact that we have to ( Read more... )

So would have really been so awful to have called Dennis on the first (April fool day) and pretended to be mad and possibly break up then shout April Fools? Yeah I thought so too but that didn't stop me from considering it. I have a few things this month like my Mom and Dad 24th wedding anniversary yeah! Also, I have my singing concert this month ( Read more... )

I was never really mad at him, more like because of him but at myself. Have you ever built your own little world for yourself not knowing you were until reality comes and crashes it down. See in a way that is what happened. I don't think I like reality however. I would say the problem out right if I thought he knew or at least wants to know.

It's ridiculously early in the morning but I can't sleep I am in pain and can't stop crying. My ovary hurts it had a huge cyst last month which should be gone. However it is not suppossed to hurt this long. 2 weeks by the way. I go to the doctor in a few hours.

So I was thinking about writing a book about my life but I wonder if I am interesting enough. Plus I know young right? Well it could be considered volume one. Is it going to as dark as some of my entries well maybe. I mean I write most of this stuff here mainly to avoid seemingly all pessimisstic to people I see everyday to get it off my chest ( Read more... )

And soon I shall know.

So I did the math and it's like I am getting paid $12 per hour on a weeknight with just like two tables at a time. I'm confused about something else which I should know the answer to soon.

So get this I go to work on Sat and my manager was like where have been. I didn't know what the fuck he was talking about. Turns out that they put on all the trainees schedule when to come test but not mine go figure. One of the mananger whom barely spoke two words to me since I met her said she told me to call. There is no way she told me to. She ( Read more... )

I'm sad and probably not because of what anyone thinks? I wish I solution would magically fall into my lap.
I think I want a teddy bear for my bday. I know little girl like but for some reason i do.

So I actually know I few people whose birthday is coming up including Lilly and my own on the 22. Happy Birthday Lilly. I never know what to ask for. I have always thought it slightly strange that you are allowed to be completely greedy on your birthday. I despise feeling greedy it hurts seriously. Maybe that is why I never know what to ask for. I ( Read more... )