"I'm not living ( Read more... )

i once found solace in letter and word but now my notebook feels like a home from some lost childhood where you learned all the bad things about life and quickly forgot them. i could weave passages, deadly like a spiders web; passionate like honeymoon nights...once. only now i'm so easily lost around corners and bends and everything that makes ( Read more... )

i'm so friggin delirious. i got off work at 11 tonight. i went in this morning at 11. i'll be over 40 hours this week i think. i only signed up for 20 hours a week for this gig. i'm so against slaving for your job but what did i do? it's alright though, i have her to think about. part of the reason is cuz i need a distraction cuz every moment she's ( Read more... )

i talked about us, as vaguely and coherently as i could, to a girl at work. how much perfect we are, our struggle. talking about you keeps me alive. it almost made her teary eyed. she was impressed and thinks it all makes sense, that only two people so in love could do this. we are now someones inspiration. it made me smile.

"You're lucky," I was told. "You already know that she loves you and have someone to suffer for. When this is all over, there's no question that she'll be there. Whereas some people wait their entire lives to find out they're going to die alone."

it's like plummeting toward earth in a plane with its engines blown, what i have done--destroyed the best thing thats ever happened to me. and this waiting... it's like wasting away, stranded on an deserted island praying that someone comes searching. every morning the fear is renewed that you're a day closer to death. but theres no choice but to ( Read more... )

I crapped out memories ( Read more... )

My heart is of Israel ( Read more... )

With the choir’s hymns ( Read more... )

hey all, what up? i'm alive. my hand is... healed for the most part and i'm back to massaging and biking. woo hoo! getting lean and back into shape. who wants a massage?