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[mindtoxins]

After a huge fight with my mom today, I found out quite a few things about her and I, and well, what she thinks I think, and her opinions on my decisions, just to find, we really don't have that hot of a relationship. She doesn't understand me at all, and I don't think I go through any effort to help her try. And it doesn't even bother me. It

Comments

[poesian]

Of Montreal are amazing live, and I am sorry that I can't see them when they're here in two weeks, but it's the day before a final.

[elentari17]

Mmmm. I had a huge, ah..."discussion" with my father where he blasted me on being so selfish and ego-centric and thinking about no one else but myself. I can't make them understand that if I can get out of the country, I'm going to...because it's my life, and my right to get the education I want. And when I told him, in tears, that I want to, in actuality, write, the only thing he could say was: "And what if no one reads what you right?" Oh, whatever. I get ya, I guess I mean. Parents have lived through their own failures (eg my Dad and his own writing) and often times try to, "help" their kids out by judging their own life sometimes. I think I'm being terribly dense- so correct me please in what I am about to ask, but how would becoming a mother solve whatever issues are in your life?

[mindtoxins]

Oh, it wouldn't solve anything, I just want to. Not now, of course, I'm planning to give it another what, 13 or so years? I just think it'd be something that I might really enjoy, and really feel kind of at-home with. My problem is, I don't see there being too many real issues in my life, I don't really consider not being too close to my mother a problem, if that makes any sense. Its strange. I'm alright with being kind of curt with her, and not having a buddy-buddy relationship with her, in part because I think I'm too old for that in this stage of my life. Maybe we can be friends when we're older, when my life has already taken off, but it feels like shes trying to hold onto me as I'm trying to turn a page

[elentari17]

I get ya. :)

Completely understandable!

Haha- are daughters ever good? The good daughters aren't any fun! I have the same feeling about my parents trying to drag me down, as well as other factors. I know you don't need any preachin' lol, but what I keep telling myself, is just to keep doing what I need to do to make my own life...sigh.

In response to something else in your post...I think we have to be selfish to get what we want to make our own lives. I had been pretty upset when my dad said such things to me...but then I realized...yeah, I am selfish, and ego-centric at home. And what? I'm not going to be able to do what I want- see new places, learn new things- if I'm subservient to their own demands. I simply wouldn't be the same person, and if you don't turn that page, odds are you won't be satisfied.

Geh, this is all repeated nonsense! But I have no doubt that you can and that you will turn the pages you want when you're ready, :)

[anonymous]

we were talking yesterday, and I asked if he wanted more space, and he said no, less.

DOn't you think, all in all, we've got far too much space between us as it is? <3

[bwee]

we were talking yesterday, and I asked if he wanted more space, and he said no, less.

DOn't you think, all in all, we've got far too much space between us as it is? <3

[mindtoxins]

Well, yes. Which is also why I'm glad you said otherwise, if there was a right answer, you gave it. I was really happy to hear you say that, and maybe I didn't mention it because I didn't want to seem as though I was coming on too strong. At any rate, lets meet up with one another tomorrow, lets stop by a park and have a picnic, can I expect you around noon?

[tanzmitbjorn]

" just to find, we really don't have that hot of a relationship"

the sentence style just cracked me up. You're an awesome writer as well as an artist, Carmelita :)

[mindtoxins]

Aw thank you :)