he finally called last night at 2am. and i think i could've cried of happiness. clearly, this next year is going to be full of ups and downs. but i just got done reading an entry from august, summarizing me and him and our summer, and it reminds me how it was to be so excited about a fresh new relationship, and to be so excited to be feeling myself ( Read more... )

all day long i have not gone 5 minutes without thinking about the dream that woke me up in tears. so i think the only way to get it out of my mind is to actually talk about it. because i havent been able to do that- merely thinking about it makes my eyes tear up ( Read more... )

i just had the worst dream i think i could possibly have, about a phone call i never want to receive. todays gonna be a very interesting day.

a girl whose dating one of andrews army friends posted this... and i like it a lot... so read it ( Read more... )

i feel like i could talk for hours about the feeling i have right now. but im not going to. maybe thats been my mistake in the past-- having these crazy feelings, and then thinking them out so much that i OVERthink them, and i cant appreciate just feeling whatever it is. so instead, i'm gonna go curl up in my twin sized bed that i've had my whole ( Read more... )

i should be asleep but i'm not. last night i had a dream that i got shot in my right shoulder. and my sister and brother were super sad, so much that my sister stayed by me the whole time. i had gotten shot, but it was as though i had cancer or something like it, because it was known by everyone, including myself that i wasnt gonna live through it ( Read more... )

in attempts to update you on my accounting progress... turns out the homework that i was getting SO frustrated at, wasnt really that wrong. just a few little mistakes. which means im getting it better than i thought i was. which means im not as angry as i was last night. which means i must remember this when i think im gonna fail terribly ( Read more... )

i am determined to understand accounting. but only because i have no choice. and it is making me want to kill myself... and we're not even a week into school. thats all i have to say about that.

you know- i was dreading going back to school. and after the first day of classes, im dreading it even more. but i cant help but think this is exactly what i need. even though im taking those last few elective classes, they all require lots of work. so between that, 25+ hours of work a week, soccer, and even my brothers wedding coming up in ( Read more... )

its a shame im not asleep already, because its the times when im up later than i should be that i start to worry and feel like ive got no control over my life and my feelings ( Read more... )