The weekend after next, I'm going to Nashville to see a Weird Al concert. I've been a fan of his since I was a kid, and this is the first opportunity I've had to see him perform ( Read more... )

I have continued to be in a pretty good mood all week. Nothing has really changed, but I feel like I've taken a couple of steps back from the edge of the cliff. Maybe the fact that I had a three-day weekend to look forward to was enough to lighten my mood ( Read more... )

So I made an appointment today. The psychiatrist's office that I chose arbitrarily from Blue Cross/Blue Shield's website is conveniently located just off base in Millington. And the earliest they can see me is September 26. I've actually been in a pretty good mood the last couple of days. I guess I'll see how t hings go the next month. I can ( Read more... )

I've almost convinced myself to go see a psychiatrist. What's the alternative? I've been dicking around with self-help books for years with little success. I've been to therapy and gotten little help from it ( Read more... )

When does it make sense to give up? At what point do you admit to yourself that you're simply incapable of doing what you want to do? How do you learn to let go when reminders of what you can't have are everywhere?

Maybe that's just the near-depression talking. Maybe I'll get over it and feel like trying again.

Posted via Journaler.

I'm still here. That's about it. Just drifting aimlessly through life. I feel like I'm an observer in the world, not a participant. I don't hardly care about anything. I have no passion for anything. I'm just taking up space ( Read more... )

I happened to run into my friend Charles this week at work, purely by chance. He was doing grunt work, hauling something into or out of my building, and I passed him in the hallway as I was coming back from the bathroom. We talked for a couple of minutes and made tentative plans to watch the UFC Saturday night ( Read more... )

I'm back from the dark place now. Depression is a bitch. Try not to catch it.

I wish I could figure out how to deal with my underlying problems.

My mood has improved somewhat. Saturday was really rough. I spent most of the day on the verge of tears and thought about things that I don't want to be thinking about. Today has been a little better.

I clearly need a change. I don't know what needs to change or how to change it, though.

I still hate my life. I am a failure, and I don't think I'm capable of anything better.

I need sleep.