Okay, so I did it. I've never done it before, but I did it this time. I made the first move. I emailed Zach. I can't believe I just did that. I hate being the one to take that initial step because then I end up as a ball of nerves. I could definitely use a Xanax right now. It sucks, I hate being in this position. Even Josh Rouse isn't calming me
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