Today's attitude: Shallow ( Read more... )

I went to Bikram yoga this morning with an old friend of mine. I managed to stay in the room, though that was hardly the most intense thing about it. I felt free, being in a room with all those people. Each of them connected to God, to the Universe, to healing, to the thread of existence. Had I asked a Rabbi if I could go there, I would have ( Read more... )

I haven't written here for quite awhile. This process has just been too deeply painful. I have come to the point where I don't really think I can complete this conversion, and yet I don't know where else I could possibly go. I practically hate orthodoxy. I can't stand it anymore. The institutionalized sexism, silencing women's voices... I don' ( Read more... )

Back to the grindstone. School starts in a couple of weeks, and I plan on going back to the Orthodox day school to teach. This time, 4th grade girls! I know the class from last year, and they're a bit of a tough crowd. One in particular is having a difficult time reigning in her emotions, and it makes the rest of the class hard to handle, too. ( Read more... )

Yesterday I sat in on a shuir at the Bais Ya'akov down the street. A friend of mine takes her daughters there, and she stays, too, even though the talks are geared for High School students. I've been going on Wednesday nights, and have enjoyed each of the speakers, all very learned and interesting Rabbis. But this week was a bit strange. I ( Read more... )

May I just say (of course, I may. This is my dang journal) how much I love Jaqueline Du Pre? What a heartbreak. Genius. Not that I'm listening to her being conducted by her (now) widower husband Maestro Barenboim, because, it is a period of mourning. She was a convert, you know.

Something just jogged my memory to ask this question. Does one say 'amen' to a bracha (a blessing) said in Hebrew by a gentile? I ask, because an orthodox Rabbi whose home I've been to many times, definitely says 'amen' when I've said, netilat yadaim, for example. He doesn't consider my Jewish. Just wondering if anyone knows.

Maybe it's not quite a double life, but how would I explain to the very frum people I had a barbeque with last night, what I was doing at the Gay and Lesbian Center after leaving their dinner? I go to 12 step meetings, and one that I participate in is at a GLBT Center. Nice meeting, great space, close to home. I've been going there for over a year ( Read more... )

Last night my husband went to a shiur (a class) with the Rabbi (Rabbi G) who is, in effect, sponsoring me for an Orthodox conversion. I usually go, too, but I misunderstood that the husband was headed to mincha before hand. Rabbi G had a talk with him, outlining the things which are expected of him as a Jew, and trying to clarify some issues he ( Read more... )

Today is the first day of August. My husband and I had a talk last night about our level of Jewish observance. I'd been gone all weekend, and we were catching up with each other. September 1st, we have an appointment with the Orthodox Bet Din to declare my intention (and his complete support and participation) to convert to Judaism ( Read more... )