I've called b twice since tuesday. I miss her, but she hasnt called me back. prolly cuz i suck. im onna those crushes that burns out really fast. and it sucks. its because i can fuck things up so friggin easily, and before i even realize i have them theyre gone. im a douche bag ( Read more... )

So i worked out. My abs suck. I should get on that. My arms are aright tho. I just need to stop slacking. i might get to see Belinda tomorrow night. well, tonight actually. even if its just for 10 seconds. im looking forward to it. my hand's reeeeeaaaalllly shaking. yay. too much liftin weights ( Read more... )

It sucks that i know what i want in a relationship. I want actual love. the thing you're inspired by an infinite number of times. the thing where you can look in each other's eyes and just smile. im tired of looking and looking. i would just feel so good to have someone now, a decent relationship that lasts. i dunno ( Read more... )

So i think i really like B. Like....a lot. Whever shes around i always catch myself fucking up more than usual. I get that weird syndrome of not wanting to screw up etc. But when I'm with jill i dont get that. Uhhhggg...i talked to B on the phone for an hour. And we had a wicked deep conversation about dying, like what we were scared of, what i ( Read more... )

Okay. Tonight I kissed Belinda. So technically I'm not cheating because I'm not with Jill. B called me too. And I don't know how to deal with it. I almost died watching her dance with Mia, then I did die when she danced against me. I need blunt wraps still. Fuck ( Read more... )

Have you ever had that feeling, where it actually feels like you're being torn apart? Well here. This is for you ( Read more... )

Today I bought Jill a rose. It was her mother's birthday, so they had me over. I got her mom a rose too. We hung out for 7 hours. And, to be quite honest, if you were to ask me what we did, I couldn't tell you. Well, Jill and I were hooking up. Actually about 4 hours all together. It was awesome. Like, in front of her mother and sister, which was ( Read more... )

God i'm tired of this. I was running late for work, so of course got all anxious today. Then after getting in a fight with my dad, he kicked me out of the truck and left. He did come back by, but him screaming in the background with Denali saying "get back in" isn't too inviting. I'm tired of him making my week, then hurting me, shoving me over and ( Read more... )

Oh man guys. B's hot. And I actually can't deal with it. Like, maybe I'm just being a guy about it, but...arrggh. Yes. So I've been creative because I'm sexually frustrated. And so I guess I must have been very creative my entire life. It actually physically hurts to think about. Because I can't DO anything about it. The way she does that face when ( Read more... )

I think i'm falling for Jill. She's so incredibly sweet and funny, and just adorable in general. We hung out tonight, with Korrine and Robin, so that was fun, but sketchy, because we hung out with some people in a basement who got some 40s and listened to death metal. but it was nice to just be with her. i'm running out of clothes. Amanda still has ( Read more... )