im not sure at this stage that i will get to move house until i am working again. this makes me PISSY. i cant afford a deposit, cant borrow a deposit, and im not homeless or imminently homeless so cant apply for the deposit bond scheme. i need to think very very long and very very hard about how i can get out of this flat, this being the case. im ( Read more... )

on monday i accidentally made an awesome fucking soup. i bought some enormous leeks, so enormous that they kept falling out of my handbag (yes i carry leeks in my handbag, what of it) onto the ground when i was walking into town. however, despite being gargantuan they were so flavoursome that when i ate the first mouthful i actually had to ( Read more... )

why did noone tell me mr scruff had written a song called 'crisps'? and that it is, in fact, almost *as good as* crisps?

also- i am currently overusing the word 'motes' in my writing. but thats fine. its a lovely word that describes a lovely thing.

gok wan seems only to want 'larger ladies' who can provide extensive photographic evidence of their manifold fashion disasters. im not sure if, as a size 12 lady with 32G enormoknockers, i entirely count as a larger lady any more. and, while im not as stylish as i tell myself i may once have been, i wouldnt call anything in my wardrobe a 'disaster ( Read more... )

i am watching the inauguration in an internet cafe because i dont have a tv. but... i really need a wee. i suspect that if i go for a wee during rick warren, ill probably get distracted and go and buy a bun or something and then i will miss HISTORY.

well, it would appear that i dont understand the phrase 'not compatible'. not being particularly technically minded, i assumed that if a machine was described as 'not compatible' with another, different kind of machine, that the first machine would not do anything when connected to the second machine, or a grey box would come up that said something ( Read more... )

i hate it when you think you know what a word means and then you find out you dont. i always thought frottage just meant, you know, dry- humping: apparently it actually means non- consensually rubbing your body against another person's body in order to achieve devious sexual pleasure. this news is officially upsetting enough to make me SWITCH OFF ( Read more... )

oh and also, i went to see the day the earth stood still yesterday, mainly because noone had specifically warned me against doing so. my favourite bit: the beginning, where keanu reeves (polar explorer) is in a tent in the snowy, blizzardy climes of one- or- t'other of the poles. he sees an unearthly light outside, and leaves the tent to ( Read more... )

i just found a bottle of kiehls formula 133 conditioner and grooming aid in the st peters hospice shop for fifty pee. the normal rrp for a bottle of said unguent in The Shops is £16. £16! ricockulous. or.... maybe not. maybe it is such an effective hair conditioner and grooming aid that it is worth more than i would spend on shampoo in a year, even ( Read more... )