hi everyone sorry if i have not written anything in awhile, i have ben just a lil bit busy with life and all. well i have ben talking with my mother more so i am getting some of the stuff out. but for some reason it is not helping and now i feel horrible.i have done so many wrong things and i am still doing them all the time.i cannot seem to do ( Read more... )

well i have calmed down a bit sence the other day.i have accepted my problem.i am going to be alone forever and there is not a dang thing i can do about it,so ohwell i tried but failed just like everything else whats one more failure right.

WHY DOES LIFE DO THIS TO ME I WANNA DIE. I HATE EVERYTHING,I CAN'T SEEM TO DO ANYTHING RIGHT AND NOW I HAVE LOST THE BEST THING IN MY LIFE.I AM SO ALONE AND I WILL BE ALONE FOREVER AND IT IS ALL MY FAULT.I DID THIS TO ME.I DON'T ONLY HATE MY LIFE I HATE MYSELF FOR MAKING MY LIFE THIS WAY.I AM SO STUPID,WHY DOES THE WORLD WANT ME HERE IT WOULD BE ( Read more... )

sorry if i haven't ben writing latley i have ben feeling really drained from no sleep i am so tired.someone said i should be thankful cause atleast im breathing.well thats not true cause i wish i weren't breathing.

i have realized sence yesterday that i have ben neglecting my duties as a friend and i have ben so stupid when everyone elses problems are staring me in the face all i can do is turn it around and talk about my problems and how bad i am feeling,i am acting just like my mother i cannot believe that i have ben so selfish.well anyways i am going to ( Read more... )

im in so much pain i wish that i could say why but i can't,well i can but....

i woke up late cause i went to bed at 7:30 last night and when i woke up i finally went outside and started to dig,i think i got a descent sized hole.the stupid hose made me fall cause it woulden't reach the hole.well anyways it is gonna take alot of work especially because our grass is the size of a tree.well ne ways i got tired and went into the ( Read more... )

yay!!! im making money every month now 100$ $.$ im gonna get dsl with it and maybe something else like a cell phone or something.i wonder how much a cell phone is.i am happy now,i also made a major decision today and i am seriously disiding to join either the marines,army,or airforce when i turn 18.i have had 2 poeple tell me to do so.

i waited up for my mom to get home and she got home finally at 8:30 this morning.i had already blacked out from being up so long with almost no sleep this weak. mom saw me when i finally woke up today and said that the bags under my eyes had bags.well anyways i guess i am ok i just woke up a lil bit ago and i am still very tired but i have to go to ( Read more... )

i have a sudden surge of happiness caused by untold reasons just be glad it's here it may or may not last.