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[nobreathtotake]

So I've been avoiding a new post... Every night before I go to bed now I've gotten into a routine. I lock the front door, trip over the diaper bag, look at the car seat walk into my bedroom check everyone's journals on the lap top and just lay in bed looking at the baby's crib. And the whole time I think this. I ask myself why did he leave me...why

Comments

[anonymous]

he left you because he is a coward. any man who would get his girlfriend pregnant and dump her is scum. honestly. any respectable responsible person would stand by her and help her, if not for her sake, for the love and well-being of their child. he is nothing more than a sperm donor. dont waste your time thinking its because you're not worth it or not good enough because its simply not true, you're the better person.

[firing_blanks]

kelle

fuck everyone, fuck every single person in your life you've ever met, known or come into contact with that says your life is fucked up and you aren't worth it. you're worth everything to someone, and that someone is all that matters. that little baby is going to need you, and that's going to be worth it.

i dont even know why the hell you still think about me, i obviously have serious problems, problems i'll never be able to get rid of either. i just get clean, and get fucked up again. i dont want to drag you into my life, and you dont want to be in it either, especially now with a baby coming. i've tried so hard for you, to clean up so we can make this work like we both want it too inside. i still try for you, and i cant do it.

[nobreathtotake]

There's always something worth fighting for in your life and your mine to fight for. Only you and I deep inside know why we do it for each other and it involves those nights where we'd just talk about stupid shit. Our connection is alot different then you'd find anywhere. I know my daughter will need me and that i'm better off without her father. But then at the same time you can't help but wish shit was different.
But you know you'll always have a part of my heart, even if things never happen.