So I didn't snack at all last night. YAY ME!! And haven't eaten yet today. I'm making myself a compromise , I'm making lasagna for dinner and I'm going to have some. But that is my 'treat' for not eating all day. My reward. I know rewards aren't suppose to be food, but in this case I need it or I'll start binging again. As I said, it's my ( Read more... )

A little better today. I still ate, but didn't totally pig out. Yet. I made pumpkin-potato soup for dinner. YUMMM! It was so good! Only I was suppose to add more pumpkin than potato but I did it the other way around. I'll do it right next time because it will be way less in cals. My neighbor is trying to lose weight too, Only she is exactly where I ( Read more... )

So now my disorder has taken on another name. It is the one I had before ana, and interchanges with mia. BED Binge eating disorder. I read the symptoms, and I know I am self-diagnosing, but I have them all. I pig out until I am uncomfortably full, I eat more than the average person, (refer back to the post where I wrote that hubby said I ate way ( Read more... )

I have no energy and no desire to do anything. That involves moving. I know it has a lot to do with the fact that all I do is eat junk and that I am no longer a healthy weight, but I am so far past caring! It is so pathetic. So I actually did something about school, I made some phone calls dealing with student loans. You know what's weird? The ( Read more... )

K. Has anyone heard of the Hollywood 48-hr miracle diet? 'Lose up to 10-lbs in 48 hours'. well, I'm going to try it. Does anyone know if it is a fast, or if you eat food with it? I couldn't see anything on the label, but maybe it's under. It would make sense though. It is a detox, so it won't shed fat, just the crap in your body, I just hope I have ( Read more... )

I bought throwing knives on our trip. they are so beautiful, so totally cool! I love the feel of them, I love to look at them. I would like to learn to throw them, get really good at it. i wonder what the penalty would be to stab someone in self-defence. How much trouble would you get in? I'm going to play with them. I was sharpening them last ( Read more... )

I love this video by Pink!! I think that all girls should watch this!!

Click to view

Let's see if this will work.
Yay it works!!!

Wow, I was craving pizza soooo bad today, I got hubby to bring some home. The dipping one from pizza hut. I ate probably 6 pieces, I absolutely GORGED!! I was so starving and wanted it so bad! Well, my stomach shrunk and I felt very uncomfortable, it was painful. I laid down for a while, still felt sick, I felt like I wanted to hurl, but I stayed ( Read more... )

I have fought feeling like I wanted to end my life for years. Ever since I was a teenager. I had so much self-loathing that I felt I would be better off dead. I didn't actually try though, I was always too afraid to hurt myself, too afraid of the pain, too afraid of succeeding. I thought that I would go to hell and that I would miss out on ( Read more... )

I think I've been depressed the last while and that's why all I want to do is sleep. I look forward to sleep and can't wait until I sleep again. I've had no desire to do anything, anything at all and I'm miserable. I think some of it has to do with the fact that I hate restricting, I feel trapped because until now, I've eaten whatever and however ( Read more... )