I learned a lesson today ( Read more... )

Today I walked into my office (have I told you?! 17th floor, with a window!) and found the following written on a small pad of paper ( Read more... )

Last night, I forced my boyfriend to concede the point that he is either racist or gay, and that no matter how he answered that question, I'm ugly.

Good goddamn having a degree in logic really helps counter-balance the insanity of being such an mf woman sometimes... if by "counter-balance," I mean, "push to the true ends of craziness."

Nothing's changed except that you think you have.

It's time the truth were out.

Last night, somewhere in between listening to Lewis Black bitch about those corporate pricks at Barnes & Noble and Simon & Schuster at (where else?)Barnes and Noble, giggling back and cuddling up with him post rant, and hanging with Eugene Mirman and Brian Posehn at the Upright Citizens Brigade Theater, challenging them in Diet Coke/PBR shotgunning ( Read more... )

In the middle of typing this ( Read more... )

Reason number 1,274 why it sucks not to have a boyfriend:

I am so wearing the *cutest* underwear right now. And no one knows.

Except me.

And, well, you.

I've taken to participating in meaningless trivia competitions, for a few months now. Now we never come in *last*, but the winning has seemingly been a pipe dream ( Read more... )

Things Claire and I are going to do to take back the night, Texas style ( Read more... )

Was it an ultimatum... me or the kids ( Read more... )