I dont know why i feel this way. I cant explain it. Contentment while the world falls down all around me. Chaos breaks out. I am calm and hopeful for today. Change is so hard to adapt to. It seems at the time that life as we know it has no meaning but then you break into another day and find yourself with a smile and a laugh. The ability to keep ( Read more... )

You caught me at a weak moment.
You dont read into anything for more than it is.
I read into everything.

I knew what you called for.
I knew i was made out to look like a fool for you.

But i will move on again,
try to forget you and not think about second chances.
Not think about what was or is or could be.

Your not anything i want..........is ( Read more... )

Went to Kokomo for a conference. Complaining the whole way but secretley wanting to go.
Wanting to feel that feeling again. Like i am right where i need to be. The feeling of knowing exactly who you are and what you want to become. Not feeling the weight of regrets from the night prior. The turmoil that eats at you throughout the day. The fake ( Read more... )

Physically drained, coughing makes my whole body shake. Fever in the triple digits and friends bringing over soup ( Read more... )

Watching the stars, tracing out things in the skky that really are not there. Sitting and enjoying a cappacino with a friend, smoking cigarettes and realizing its a friday night and we're doing nothing and are okay with that. The last time this year it was about being where the crowd was and now its the exact opposite ( Read more... )

Enjoyable night
Filled with coffee, friends, and food
so fun to just be
Asking stupid questions followed by intense painful laughing
Questions like:
Is albanians the same as Europeans, and what about Caldieans?
Is the french language the same as Italian?
We figured it out to say the least, i think?!

I guess getting in my head was apart of the plan
cause in reality all you gave me was promises
Im over it...Not today

Did absolutley nothing today
A waste of sunlight
Tomorrow includes shopping,
going to the gym, and the club.
oh and seeing a guy that i can only be friends with
better than today....but still no job

i gotta get some motivation to become ( Read more... )

My theory about my current situation ( Read more... )

the road is long and the cost is much. I regret and miss most of all the people im leaving. Suddenly a sense of attachment hits me. Why? dont know. Maybe i have been kidding myself saying that i am free from emotional attachments. Emotional attachments from friends family and him. I like him. I like to be with him. I like that i have him and other ( Read more... )

my last two entries are quite intersting. Excuse my drunkeness that all too often happens. Puttin my two weeks notice in so then it will be official. Im coming home! Friends from home keep calling ( Read more... )