The doctor asked me if I'd been feeling depressed.
I told her I was happier than I was last year.
She asked if things were going well.
I said yes.

She closed the door behind her and I cried for the first time in months.

Thirty minutes later, I was hooked up to an EKG.

I'm spreading myself too thin.

We had a fight on Friday, and I think it changed me. That sounds weird I'm sure, but something just isn't working right in me anymore. I sat in the back corner of a bookstore for two hours today, reading graphic novels and books about vampires that I thought I'd never touch. Strange Flesh turned something on in the back of my mind. Creatively, I ( Read more... )

When you walk down the center of that college back road at a little past one in the morning and there's mist in the air from broken rain drops, you can feel it. Your eyes close and you breathe in the fresh fall Tallahassee air. You let the condensation roll across your flesh ( Read more... )

You tell yourself, "Close your eyes ( Read more... )

I spent the weekend in Albany while Andy spent it in Saint Petersburg. Things changed. Debate is over, they fought, and Tasneem and I spent hours just talking. She taught me how to eat Indian food correctly and what shampoo and conditioner makes your hair look amazing and that it's good to live in the moment, like I always used to ( Read more... )

It hits you at 3:34 in the morning, when you feel that first breath of air fill your lungs; when you forget where you are for an instant and you can feel the contentment wash over you because everything is right in the world ( Read more... )

As of this instant, I have finished two of the three online courses that have been plaguing my system for the past five, six, seven, innumerable months. I have drudged through them and the light at the end of the tunnel is in sight. At this point, I can only hope that the economic crisis of my procrastination doesn't ultimately find the light's ( Read more... )

Everything about Friday night was perfect. Even getting to dinner late. And getting split up from the group and ending up just sitting at a table for four. And the lizard versus cockroach fight outside of Carraba's. And having the car alarm go off four times before Derrick's parents had to drive to the Sunken Gardens parking lot at one in the ( Read more... )

April 11th. "I have officially begun to self-destruct." And that's how the blog was going to begin. But I was sick of venting, and watching everything fall apart, and so I closed the window and decided I'd make my last real night in town count. I told him I loved him, and we cried and said we didn't want to fight anymore. And I left knowing I didn' ( Read more... )

I skipped class and went to the IC room today. She sat down across from me and knew something was wrong.

"I'm scared that I'm bored." More words, and more and more and no explanation.

All she said was, "Oh shit."

We all deserve something.