[HEY GUESS WHAT DAY IT IS! It's the first night of Hanukkah, and if you are Annie's friend, a friend of Annie's friend, or happen to have breasts, you have been invited over Annie's house for the celebration! And by invited, I definitely mean forced. Perhaps bodily dragged.

A. There is a really hideous-looking plastic menorah on a table next to the ( Read more... )

[Well. That sucked.

After such a horrific experience, Annie sure is glad for her last regain!

Family will find her on the living room couch surrounded by a cloud of smoke, a crudely-wrapped cigarette in her hand and a plastic bag of some green plant by her side. It does not smell like tobacco. At all.

Later on, she will be making a phone call. Because ( Read more... )

( cut for character death )

[Flowers. Everybody likes flowers, right? Only a heartless monster wouldn't!

WELL

Annie resents flowers, all flowers, for reasons she does not care to go into for too many people know already THANKS DAN thank you very much. But, as Mayfield's national pastimes include baseball and irony, she is currently working in the very aptly-named local flower ( Read more... )

[By night, the werewolf works...

HAHA, not so much, it's, like, mid-afternoon and Annie is all up on your shit, putting up this beautifully hand-drawn poster on every available and unavailable surface. Walls. Doors. The slower-moving elderly. Everything. They are all her billboard bitches now.

Catch her in the act. Catch her after the act. Catch her ( Read more... )

[A: 1667 Nelson Street]

[Ah, sleep. One of Annie's favorite things to do on a bed. But, her bed feels a lot bigger today than it normally does, which is really weird. It's not like she's an expert or anything, but she's pretty sure twin beds... There's also someone else in it, which is weird for Mayfield. Maybe Raz had a nightmare or something...

She ( Read more... )

[phone]

So.

I think we all learned some pretty important fucking lessons here.

One: Don't trust anything you hear from stuttering little bitches, because if they'll lie to one person about what their fucking intentions are, they'll definitely have no problem lying to a whole bunch of evil fucks over the phone.

Two: The only thing worse than a fat Nazi ( Read more... )

[Good Lord, what is that smell?

Did you know you can burn scrambled eggs? It's very much possible, and Annie, who has never cooked anything more complicated than Hot Pockets, has invariably fucked this whole "cook breakfast for the family thing" up. However, since she also has invariably fucked up taste buds, she's still cooking.

She will also be ( Read more... )

[There's really only one thing for a semi-immortal to fear, really. And that's death.

Now that Annie has experienced death for the first time, she's slightly surprised by how little it appears to have affected her. She's back, isn't she? She's lying in her bed and walking to the bathroom and staring at the mirror. She's alive. There's nothing to ( Read more... )

Oh my God, this is such bullshit.

[Because Annie must obviously be angered at the sheer injustice of having to kill her fellow inmates right.

Right.]

I mean, why tell me to kill someone and then take away all the shit that I could use to kill them with! And I don't even know who this fuck is! This is gonna be so much harder than it fucking has to be. ( Read more... )