so i took some sleeping pills last night to go to bed around 9:30 even though the celtics were on. My stomach was achng all day. finally tossed and turned a bit then awoke around 5 and decided to eat a huge slice of coffee cake. stuffing my face in the pantry leaving a ton of crumbs. then went to the bathroom to puke it all out. Well little did i ( Read more... )

Today is good ol memorial day. Not really a bog deal at all. My mom and I walked down to hte beach for an hour. but i refused to take off my sundress. one because i had fresh cuts on my stomach and 2 because i wanted to hide my stomach. I couldn't decide, i went back and forth between "i dont want her to see how skinny i have gotten... or to me " ( Read more... )

i woke up decided to weigh myself. hop on after going ot the bathroom and stufff. and i realise im at 83 pounds on my scale though. it could be wrong ya know? i feel so accomplished. i really do ( Read more... )

but.... jsut wanna share my bad luck with men. i wrote a poem about it which i'll post in days to come... fucking argh sometimes i feel used or betrayed almsot like i never wanna date again im afraid of gettting hurt over and over again. I always get parenoid that the person im with is jsut using me.. maybe it stemmed from being with mat for so ( Read more... )

im 87 just wannabe 80 for short term goal.... fuck fuck fuck, so im on a 200-300 calories per day thing for 2 dayas now. and fat under8 grams hope it works...jsut emaciate me please i know i am sick. but 87 is too much<33< to handle and if i ever seethe dial on the scale jumppast 90i'll be so discouraged. rageeeeeessssss ( Read more... )

Not literally. but I jsut dont think nick and I are evergunna get back together. he probably is already dating a new girl. I'mso angry with myself for having this happen. the breakup that is. I can't seem to letit go. now its alomst 6 a.m and im aactually at his apartment while he sleeps i went oiut wit one of my girlfriends last night for dinner ( Read more... )

Last night was a horrible night for eating that is.... let me begin by saying i went outwith the girls from work to a mexican restaurant. I ordered a bean and rice burito and of course to make it look like i actually do eat i ate almost the whole fucking thing and it was huge. so my excuse to go and puke it up was a cigarette break ( Read more... )

I stepped on the scale yesterday with clothes on and after i have eaten and i was 88 pounds...... my scale is off I'm sure of that but still ( Read more... )

getting over you is hard. every fucking song that was ours makes me weak. the scent of you is still on the hat you gave me. yet i can't part with it. I still have all the letters you have written me. I'm sick with the loss of you it seems. I do want to move on though. and realise we weren't meant to be forever. I'm always tempted to reread your ( Read more... )

Huge blizzard swept over mass yesterday. In the matter of 6 hours we got 10 inches. i got let outta work early but ended up having to wait almost two hours in the snow for my damn bus. I swear I had frostbite on my toes ( Read more... )