Well I'm feeling trapped. Sitting outside smoking my first cig in six months. My husband is kind of a boarder line alkie and I can't handle it. He doesnt care when he hurts me because he just tries to deny anything but the fact that I just have a bad attitude. Not that he could possibly hurt me... Which he doesn't care about anyway. He talks about ( Read more... )

So we started arguing tonight because I feel like I can't be myself around him. He thinks I'm immature because I don't clean to his sparkling bacteria free standards.. He says nothing I do to try to show him I care amounts to much because he feels I half ass everything I do. He tells me he doesn't like how I handle situations with the boys and then ( Read more... )

I'm going crazy inside will.
How come?
The distance between us. I've been committed to you and doing what I know how to do and learning new ways to handle things, and the distance just grows. Idk what else to do. I've lost faith in our situation ever changing.
I've been committed to you and our relationship since the day you showed up at my parents ( Read more... )

I have no where else to go to escape. No where is safe. You're eyes are always on me, watching, nit picking. My eyes grow dark. My heart harrdens. I am not my own, and surely not yours. Do you know you cannot own the soul of another? Well, do you?

I thought I loved will. I still think I do at times. It is so easy for one such as myself to love ( Read more... )

New
But you still
Cannot
Escape
The past

And with that I turned a positive into a negative. But at the same time this is good. Even tho he's going to meet up with her possibly reminisce with her. This is his closure and he's letting go. I've been a huge part of the process. Id like to think I have my best friend back. Do I? Is it really real? I can make ( Read more... )

I watched the office the other night. It was the episode after Dwight and Angela made their baby contract and Dwight started seeing isabel again without telling Angela..... Anyway on the parking lot Angela confronts Dwight about upholding their contract and he's like are you serious I don't want you and Isabel hits Angela on the forehead and ( Read more... )

I'm more worried about our future.... There is no future

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I can't help wishing kenji and I could run away and start a new adventure. I don't leave jack out because I don't love him, only that he's so much like his father that I don't think I could be the mother jack needs to be successful. Will and I bring out the worst in each other and I'm afraid that's all I can ever do for jack anymore. Kenji on the ( Read more... )

Will told me the other night I put too much happiness into him. He said sometimes I don't want to huge and be touched or to talk about things or go places with you. I guess I impede on his space. My problem is I rarely do anything physical. I rarely hug him or want to be close to him. When I do, I'm pushed away. He said that my actions are so ( Read more... )

I've been questioning everything. I don't feel like I'll ever be happy with will. I don't think we can ever have a good relationship. I thought about what it would be like if I left. I know already. I'd be anxious about him with other people. Wed fight all the time about parenting the boys. And I'd cry a lot thinking about why I couldn't keep my ( Read more... )