The show must go on [3/6]
Crashing- Jack’s mannequin
Jin moaned in protest as Pi pushed him inside the big top and toward the place where the net was folded up.
“You tie that end, I’ll tie it on the right.”
“It’s too hot for practice.” Jin harrumphed.
“It’s not like I want to practice either, Jin.”
“Then why are we doing it?” Jin whined, half heartedly tying the net’s ropes around the pole; he was too busy complaining to his best friend to pay attention to the task at hand.
“Because Takki will get angry if we don’t, and I don’t really want that to happen.”
Jin grumbled some more as he climbed up the pole and onto the platform. He sprinkled some magnesium powder on his hands, rubbed them together and grabbed the trapeze to jump into the air without a moment of hesitation, soon building up swing enough to jump and reach one the static trapezes hanging right in the centre of the big top. He held onto it with his hands and turned to glare at Pi, who was just jumping off the platform on the other pole.
“We’re supposed to do this in synch, you know?” Jin glared at Pi as the boy finally reached the other static trapeze.
“I thought it was you who couldn’t be arsed to practice.”
“Well, if I have to do it, I’d like to do it properly.”
Pi laughed and tried to kick Jin in the air, which made the two of them swing in the air for a moment. Their routine started by building up some swing force to throw their legs in between their arms and follow the motion with their whole body until they were facing the audience again. They continued by hanging by their legs from the trapeze bar to hoist themselves up and grab the ropes, moving their legs to stay in the air and keeping the position without touching the wooden bar.
Once they got serious they were able to perform the movements totally in synch. They wrapped the ropes around their arms to stand before the trapeze, totally straight in the air, or spreading their legs so they could hang upside down by the hips and slide down until only their ankles were keeping them on the trapeze. Climbing back up to the bar and bending their one of their legs - each one the opposite leg than the other - so one of the ropes got caught behind the knee and allowed them to hang upside down with their other leg straightened out until their feet were touching; they arched their torsos to grab each other hands too for some moments before letting go and performing a new movement.
When they finished the routine in the static trapezes, Jin helped Pi jump toward the swinging one, that was hanging motionless after the initial swing motion stopped. Their combined impulse was enough to make the boy reach the trapeze and start the motion again, so he could let Jin hold onto his legs and give him the momentum to reach the other swinging trapeze. However, Jin seemed to be too lazy to practice anymore, and he started teasing Pi by swinging back on his own trapeze every time he was supposed to jump for the other boy to catch him. Jin laughed happily as it made Pi lose his balance and swing clumsily for a moment after each joke.
“Come on, Jin! Stop being a kid and do this seriously!” Pi shouted annoyed, but Jin only laughed again.
“Alright, alright! I’ll do it properly next time, so be prepared!”
Pi smirked as the trapeze swung back. When they were flying to the centre of the big top again and Jin let go of the bar to jump, Pi reached out with his arms, but instead of grabbing Jin’s hands he followed the motion with the rest of his body and sat on the trapeze bar. It was a joke they had played on each other countless times, but Jin still fell for it every time Pi tried it.
Jin had no time to do anything, completing the somersault he had started and falling on the net with a squeak while Pi laughed above him. Only the net didn’t take Jin’s weight like it was supposed to do. It shook and the ropes tying its ends to the poles came loose and the net fell to the ground, along with the boy. Pi felt the hair on his nape bristling at the noise Jin’s body made when the boy hit the ground, and for a moment the big top was awfully silent as Pi held on the last remains of hope that his friend was just keeping silent to scare him and take revenge.
Yamapi tightened his hold around the ropes and grew increasingly paler as Jin still wasn’t answering. The trapeze had lost its swinging motion, but the only way he had of going down to check on his friend was getting back to the pole. Still calling Jin’s name loudly Yamapi dropped his body to hold onto the bar with his hands and start a swinging motion again, but it was taking too much time. He gave his body all the momentum he could, not even noticing how his sight became blurry with tears or how his shouts became more high-pitched and desperate.
Yamapi had just reached the pole when he saw Ryo’s head poking inside the big top. He had never been so glad to see someone else in his whole life.
~*~*~*~*~
Kame had just finished brushing Bonami’s hair when he heard the ambulance’s sirens. The horse stomped his hooves on the ground nervously as he felt his owner’s sudden anxiety. Kame barely paused for a few second to lightly pat the animal’s neck before rushing out of the stable, trying to find the ambulance in the big circus location. He found it parked a few meters away from the big top, surrounded by a small group of people. Kame stopped next to Subaru and Yasu, a little out of breath. By the vehicle’s back Nagase was talking with someone who seemed to be the ambulance’s driver in a hushed tone.
“What happened?”
Subaru shrugged, though both clowns were frowning worriedly too. “I think there was an accident in there, but they won’t let us in. Tsubasa took Yamapi out a few minutes ago…” Kame got suddenly pale, but Yasu completed his companion’s sentence before he could do anything else.
“He looked fine, though, but Akanishi-kun hasn’t come out yet.”
The man had barely finished talking when two paramedics ran out of the big top pulling a stretcher with them. It took only a moment before they wheeled it into the ambulance, but it was enough for Kame’s world to stop as he saw Jin lying unconscious on the stretcher. Kame felt his whole body getting colder as his stomach plummeted to his feet and the bile rose from his stomach. He cried out something as panic took a hold on him and Kame was barely aware of trying to run toward the ambulance and his friend, calling out maybe Jin’s name, only to be stopped by Koichi and Tsuyoshi. He watched with a weird sense of detachment as Takki and Nagase jumped into the vehicle’s back with Jin and the paramedics closed the doors.
Kame fell to the ground as the vehicle rushed away. He felt comforting hands rubbing his back, but he could only stare at the place where the ambulance had drove away with blurry sight, and even after the vehicle was no longer visible the only thing he could hear were the loud noise of its sirens, stuck on his mind. Everything seemed kind of surreal, like he was living a dream but while being aware of dreaming. Because that had to be a dream, a nightmare, because Jin, his best friend, had just been taken away on a stretcher, unconscious and unresponsive, and Jin was a trapeze artist and only God knew from how high he had fallen…
Someone grabbed Kame under his armpits to pull him up, though he swayed a little as soon as he was left to stand on his own. A bottle of cold water was pressed to his lips and he took a few sips unconsciously. His world started to clear up a little as someone else wetted his face with some more water, and his sight focused just enough to make out Koichi and Tsuyoshi looking worriedly at him. There were some more people around, but they had let the two men take care of everything; the two acrobats were the oldest men in the circus.
“Hey, kid. Are you alright?” Kame blinked at Tsuyoshi blankly. “I know you’re worried about Akanishi, but he’s going to be fine, alright? Why don’t you go to sit down for a while? I think you need to calm down a little.”
Kame shook his head, drinking some more water. “Where’s Yamapi?”
“Are you worried about him? He is totally fine, just a little scared like you. Tsubasa took him back to his RV a while ago.”
Kame didn’t even reply before running off toward the ringmasters’ RV. He felt like a stranger inside the circus as he ran; most people seemed to be going about their daily routines as if nothing out of the usual had happened, only some of them exchanging careful comments about the accident. The door of the RV was closed when Kame finally reached it, but he yanked it open and climbed inside. He had to stop for a few seconds to catch his breath and take in what was happening. Yamapi was sitting on the bed with a blanket wrapped around his shoulders and a glass full of warm tea between his hands. He was looking pale and shaken, and it was obvious even from afar that he was trembling badly. Tsubasa was sitting by his side rubbing the boy’s back softly, but he got up when he saw Kame.
“Kame-chan -”
The boy didn’t even stop to listen to what the man had to say. He pushed past Tsubasa to stand in front of Yamapi, hands fisted at his sides as he was seething with pure rage; Kame’s lips were closed tightly and he was seeing red. He knocked Pi’s glass off the boy’s hands with a furious motion, startling both his friend and the adult beside him as it shattered against the ground.
“What the fuck have you done?!” Yamapi shook and hunched his shoulders forward as if trying to protect himself. Tsubasa said something in the background, but Kame couldn’t even hear it. “Just what the fuck have you done, Yamashita?! Have you seen Jin?! Have you seen your friend?! He was fucking being wheeled into an ambulance, unconscious, and only you were there with him! What the hell were you doing, Yamashita?! What the fuck have you done to my friend?!”
Kame felt Tsubasa pulling him away just as he had raised a fist against the other boy. He still struggled, though his sight was blurry and his voice was high and broken with tears. He fought against the man even when he was no longer able to stop himself from crying, until Tsubasa managed to drag him to the door. Kame let himself be taken outside with a last scream.
“This is all your fault, Yamashita! It’s all your fault!”
Tsubasa closed the RV’s door with a slam and rushed back to Yamapi’s side. The boy was looking paler than before and shaking more too. He had his eyes tightly closed, though that couldn’t stop the tears that were running down his cheeks, and he was holding onto the blanket around him like a lifeline. Tsubasa sighed and tried to place a comforting hand on the boy’s shoulder, but he jerked away with a sob.
Yamapi couldn’t take it any longer; he turned to the side and threw up.
~*~*~*~*~
Where I belong - Motion city soundtrack
The following days were hard for the boys. The doctors had decided to keep Jin hospitalized to check that the fall and the strike to his head hadn’t had more serious consequences than a few stitches on his forehead and a broken arm. There was always someone with him at the hospital, either Takki or Nagase - the man was especially fond of Jin, since it had been him who had found the boy as a baby - but Kame and Yamapi weren’t allowed to go visit him, though they did let them speak with Jin on the phone every day. Jin was cheerful and reassuring, but things were hard at the circus.
Takki lived with Yamapi in the ringmasters’ RV and Tsubasa had moved into the boys’ own vehicle with Kame, since the boys were not talking to each other. Yamapi couldn’t practice alone, and even though Takki had ordered Kame to keep practicing his number every day, soon it became obvious that it was too dangerous for the boy to do it as distracted as he was. Not having anything do during the day gave them too much time to think, though.
Yamapi started having nightmares. He had already been feeling guilty about the accident, and Kame’s words finally did it. Not even Jin’s words over the phone were enough to make him realize it had not been his fault, nor would the adult’s reassuring work. He was gloomy and the lack of sleep wasn’t doing him any good. The adults were busy attending to their own affairs, and with Jin hospitalized and Kame angry at him, Yamapi spent most of his time alone in the RV, since he refused to accept Ryo’s company more often than not. It was the first time ever he was separated from Jin, and it was being really hard on him.
Kame felt lonely too. Once he was able to talk with Jin and his friend managed to convince him that he was alright the worry started to fade, though the scare lasted for a few more days. He spent most of his time with the horses, taking care of them or taking long walks with Bonami; as summer got closer they had started to travel to the north and the scenery was beautiful with big green forests. However, it was not the same without his friends. He was too upset at Yamapi to miss him, but he did miss Jin. Kame missed him terribly. It was not the first time they were separated - that had been when Jin and Pi decided to try living outside the circus - but somehow it felt different than the last time, though he could not quite pinpoint on what. Now that he couldn’t spend his time with Jin, being with the older boy was the only thing he could think about.
Kame was out for a walk with Bonami the day Jin finally returned to the circus, a week and a half later. He had his right arm in a cast, but they had already taken off the stitches on his forehead and he was smiling brightly. He stumbled a little when Yamapi’s body collided against his in a tight hug, but he laughed and returned it with his cast pressing uncomfortably against their chests. No one had told Jin about the fight between his two friends, so of course his first question when they sat down on their bed was to be expected.
“Where’s Kame?” Pi gulped, squirming. He had been holding Jin’s healthy hand, but he let go of it to twist his hands together nervously. Jin blinked at his friend’s reaction, confused. “Is he okay?”
“We… We fought that day and we still haven’t made up.”
“Why did you fight?” Pi looked down with a sigh. He was at a loss for words. What was he supposed to say? He could have killed his best friend. How was he supposed to apologize? He felt the older boy shifting closer and Jin tilted his head to look at Yamapi in the eye with worry. “Pi? Are you alright?”
“Kame… He was angry at me. When he found out what had happened, he said it was my fault… And he was right, Jin. I’m so sorry for what I did! But it was just a joke! We did it a hundred times when we were kids, how was I supposed to know you’d get hurt?! I never wanted to hurt you, Jin!”
Jin wrapped his healthy arm around his friend’s shoulder and rested his head on it, sighing a little. “I know. You are my best friend, of course I know you’d never hurt me. It was me who didn’t pay attention while tying the net. It I had done it properly, none of this would have happened.”
Pi smiled, resting his cheek on Jin’s head and holding the boy’s hand again. It felt good being together again; Jin and he had always been joined by the hip. He knew that if that accident had happened to someone else more words would have been needed, but just a moment was enough for them. Though he couldn’t forget there was something missing, or rather someone.
“What about Kame?”
“Don’t worry about that, I’ll talk to him.”
~*~*~*~*~
Something about you - Corrinne May
Kame was unsaddling Bonami in the stables when Jin found him. He had wanted to just lean against the door to watch his friend work for a while, but as usual the horse started fretting and neighing as soon as he approached the stables. Kame was frowning when he looked up, but his expression changed the moment he saw Jin. Kame dropped the horse’s saddle, throwing himself against Jin’s body to hug him. Jin winced in pain, but he hugged Kame back anyway, ruffling his friend’s hair affectionately. Jin laughed loudly when Bonami tried to push his muzzle between them, pushing them apart.
“I think someone here is jealous.”
Kame smiled, fishing a few sugar cubes out of his pocket and feeding them to the horse while patting the animal’s strong neck. Jin touched him carefully too, but Bonami was too busy eating the sugar to care about the other boy.
“I’ve even missed the horses.”
“That’s new coming from you! Would you like to come for a walk?”
“You just came back from one, won’t he be tired?”
Kame laughed, picking up the saddle to put it on Bonami again. The horse merely shifted a little, trying to get more sugar from his owner’s pocket. “Nah, this guy here is strong.”
Jin climbed up to sit in front of Kame on the saddle, since he wouldn’t be able to hold onto the boy properly with his broken arm. The younger boy grabbed the reins with one hand and wrapped his other hand around Jin’s middle firmly; he was even careful to make the horse go slower than he would usually ride when going with Jin. The walk was silent, both of them simply enjoying the other’s company as Kame directed Bonami into the forest near the town; he had discovered a nice meadow a few days ago and he liked to spend his time there. He didn’t even bother to tie the horse after they dismounted, and just followed Jin to flop down on the grass. He rolled onto his side to look at his friend.
“How are you feeling?”
“Totally fine, of course! I’m indestructible, you know.”
Kame rolled his eyes, brushing the white plaster with his fingertips. “You’re such a child. For being indestructible you’re wearing a nice cast, though. No one has signed it yet?”
Jin laughed softly, catching his friend’s hand with his healthy one. “I’ll let you be first if that makes you happy.”
“When did you arrive?”
“A few hours ago. I’ve been talking with Pi.”
“Oh.” Kame let go of Jin’s hand and rolled to lie on his back again, staring at the sky intently even though he had to squint his eyes due to the strong light. Jin sighed and rolled onto his side to look at the younger boy, but he winced in pain as his broken arm got caught under his body and had to lie on his back again. He finally got up with a frown and without heeding Kame’s curious look he moved to sit down on the boy’s thighs.
“Ouch! Jin, what are you doing?! You’re not exactly made of feathers, you know.”
“It was not his fault.” Kame looked away with a pout, but Jin was not to stop that easily. “Kazuya. You don’t really think it was his fault, right? You can’t think that.”
“I know! I just… I… Everything was fine and the next moment I saw an ambulance and you where being wheeled into it and you were fucking unconscious and the only person who had been with you was him and you’re a trapeze artist, for God’s sake, who knew from what height you had fallen!”
“But you can see I’m fine. I told you I was fine when we talked over the phone.”
“I know! But I just… He should have been careful! He shouldn’t have let you get hurt!”
“Well, I should have tied the net properly.” Jin mumbled.
Kame sighed, finally looking up at Jin. “I know. I know that. I just was afraid. I don’t know what I’d have done if something had happened to you. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
Jin grinned, flashing his friend a victory sign. “Well, you’ll never have to find out.”
Kame smiled, reaching up to loop his arms around Jin’s neck and pull the other down. For a moment they just looked at each other with their faces so close they had to squint their eyes, until Kame closed his and raised his head a little to press his lips against Jin’s. The kiss was chaste and simple; Kame couldn’t help to smile against Jin’s lips as the other boy didn’t try to pull away but slipped his healthy hand around Kame’s nape to hold him better. Kame threaded his fingers through Jin’s mane, grinning brightly up at him once they finally broke the kiss.
“I think I like you.”
Jin raised his eyebrows. “I think I might like you back.”
Kame laughed happily, kissing Jin again. “You better never give me a scare like this again, you big idiot.”
“Or what?”
“Or I’ll kick your sorry ass until falling from the trapeze seems nothing to you.”
Jin laughed, rolling around so Kame was sitting on his lap, and placed his hand on the boy’s hip. “Is that what you’re going to write on my cast?”
“That or how happy I am that you are safe and back.”
The boys smiled brightly at each other before Jin pulled Kame down again for another kiss, this time deeper and longer. They both laughed when they felt someone pulling Kame back and broke the kiss to see Bonami biting on Kame’s shirt and taking his owner away by pulling on it.
“Maybe I’ll have to make a deal with him to share you!”
To part II | To part IV