What do you think of when you think of “America”? Do you think of an afternoon walk on Cape Cod? Do you think of how shoddy that last pitch was and how could your team give it up again? Do you think of a quiet afternoon in a coffee house, sipping a tasty hot beverage? Or do you think of endless plains interrupted only sporadically by the random ( Read more... )

She rode up to me with the fire of her mane billowing whipping up angry tongues of flame in her wake. Her gallop carried her up 24 stories where her transparent form melted through the concrete wall and window until she stood snorting her hot lotus breath on me. There in the darkness that her phantasmal inner fire couldn't touch, the breath curled ( Read more... )

I had a day off on Friday. The productive ones would have holed up in their rooms, headphones popping out like two bulbous eyes at the side of their heads while their fingers played Tigger the Tiger on their keyboard. Evidently, I'm not "a productive one" because I went into town for books, hamburgers and sweet new Transformers. But sometimes ( Read more... )

I woke this morning to Axl Rose screaming propaganda in my ear. 19 years ago, in the heyday of Guns and Roses, he sang about Civil War, how "it feeds the rich while it buries the poor."It's a song that illustrates the realities of the dual nature of conflict: those who fight and those employed to die. Yet regardless of who has what role, the single ( Read more... )

Chapter 5 - The Mighty Monument

“Welcome back to the land of the living!” Hamish said after Zelig groaned his way awake on Hamish’s back.

“Where are we?” Zelig mumbled.

“You’re on my back. I knew you’re tired and didn’t want to wake you. And as for all of us, we’re back in ( Read more... )

Chapter 4 - Niero Pyrite

It seemed like only a heartbeat had passed before they were cruising up a ramp and into the giant garage of the Taxi-Wheel station. Swarms of Taxi-Wheels zipped up and down the station’s various ramps, giving Hamish the sense of worker bees buzzing in and out of a giant honeycomb ( Read more... )

Chapter 3 - Grand Thneed City

A tourist brochure once described Grand Thneed City as “the wondrous home of the super-efficient Grand Thneed Production Plant, a city boasting unmatched views of the Lumbidoor Valley with endless vistas of the Kiminigor Mountain range. Activities within the city abound, ( Read more... )

Chapter 2 - Umpa

Umpa died that night.

A heavy, oppressive cloud entered Lumbidoor and refused to leave. Death had come at last for the old Lumban who had escaped its grasp on countless occasions. It rode in its chariot through the streets, chilling all to the very bone with its shriek of ( Read more... )

                While the name may look like a middle schooler’s first attempt at profanity, Quentin Tarantino’s movie, “Inglourious Basterds” is far from an effort at the profane. Exciting, loud, chock full of colorful characters and boasting a bevy of cinematic shots that some directors use with a clumsy disregard for their audience’s stomachs. ( Read more... )

Chapter 1 - The Rainy Day Feast

While the people of Lumbidoor were as diverse as any small community, nothing said Lumban better than Feast-day. The reason for this being that it brought together their three favorite things in all the world: friends and family, food, and a story that ignited their ( Read more... )