Feeling like I'm on the losing side of a war again. I feel wholly unattractive and very depressed. I get to go see my doctor Monday, yay. But I'm so worried that there won't be enough time to get two rounds of meds done before Matt goes away for the summer. My symptoms are spiraling wildly out of control and there's not a damn thing I can do about ( Read more... )

Tonight, I feel like the PCOS is winning. I don't feel hopeful, I don't feel positive. And I definitely don't feel pretty or attractive. This is what sucks: that all the medicine I was on to control the symptoms will keep me from getting pregnant, but now that I am off them, I'm still not pregnant _and_ I have symptoms to deal with. SO I'll just, ( Read more... )

( cut for those uninterested in procreation ramblings )

I haven't written anything about the BP oil spill yet, which feels odd for me. Stranger still, when the "accident" (for lack of a better all-encompassing term) first happened I didn't read, watch, or listen to any reports about it. I think I wanted to be in denial because the truth was so God-damned depressing ( Read more... )

I've decided to take Spring quarter off from school. I took off last Spring for the wedding and went back to school easily enough in the summer, so I'm not worried about "losing momentum" or whatever. I've also decided to take a Great Books class this summer. Something simple that will remind me why I actually _enjoy_ going to school. In order to ( Read more... )

I finally admitted to my family that there is about a 0.05% chance of me finishing my current master's degree. They were surprisingly supportive. I was flummoxed, but pleased. That is a big ball of stress off my shoulders. Now I just need to form some kind of cohesive plan for the future of my academic career. Since I paid off $9000 of my student ( Read more... )

Potato soup is _awesome_! I've made 2 batches of it now, and it gets better each time. I guess technically its potato and shrimp soup - thanks, Paula Dean! Just thinking about it makes my mouth water. Of course, since its a Paula Dean recipe it has butter (her favorite condiment) and half n half. SO this is in no way a figure friendly meal. But it ( Read more... )

It's very unusual to hear my name used on TV (okay, apart from a certain Disney channel show which shall remain nameless) - but last night I watched an episode of Bones where the victim had my name. They just kept saying it over and over and over. It was kind of weird. I started talking about the character as though it were me "Honey, did you know ( Read more... )

You know what my New Year's Resolution is? (And I didn't pick it until well after the new year) I've decided I don't give a flying flip about trying to lose weight. I am tired of feeling bad about my body when there isn't much reason to. I'm tired of feeling guilty about not exercising 10x more than I do. Rather, I intend to maintain the status quo ( Read more... )

Its the week of Christmas!!!! I'm soooo HAPPY!!!!!!! I've had to make a to do list of things which _must_ get accomplished in the next three days or I would waste all of my time listening to christmas music, watching christmas movies, and going crazy decorating the tree that Matt and I got for free last night :-) I just love Christmas so MUCH!!!