fortunately, at least in my opinion fortunately, the ways of how we are, how we are perceived, and how we perceive ourselves is always subject to debate. depending on the day, i'm the overly-horny girl that ruined my parents lives, causing a pain so deep they try to forget my existence. on other days, i do much better. and while we're all able to go back and forth between those days (and should!), i wonder, what day do you want today?
it's so easy to forget that in many ways we get to choose how we see ourselves. today i'd like to see myself as soneone who is gentle, tender and trying. how do you want to see yourself today?
actually, i wanted to really work on having a 7 yo boy think i was the coolest babysitter in the world. so, i set aside all of my rules and regulations, bought him the most amount of candy, went to the movie theatre, ate chinese for lunch, played soccer in the park, rode bikes, and made the most kick ass tent with a wild game of GI Joe gun fighting to follow, and i pretty much think i accomplished my goal. but mostly i just wanted to hold afton and let her see how much she fills me with life. a good day, a good day indeed.
well i should say so. i wish my parents would pay you to hang out with me.
i thought about you a lot today. about what you said, and you and i in savannah as well as here in seattle. i thought about who you are and how desperately i love you. it was nice. like a long-distance hug that didn't seem so long-distance.
thank you. for feeling things with me. it is sad. but at the same time it was a frame of mind that i'm not in at this moment. so it seems far away. like you and i are feeling sad for some girl that we both know. i think this is a good and a bad thing. i'd really like to start seeing someone. i'd really like to stop saying that and actually start doing something about it.
Yeah, I'm working on very similar shit right now and I agree with you that it's good and bad. Good in that it allows us to function, bad in that we're really in denial...
har-har. i will admit though, that i talked to him earlier today. bitched and whined and got a lot of sticky, moldy stuff out in the open. i felt a little bit better.
well you shouldn't because after you talked to him he called me and told me that "he hit it".....i don't know what that means, but maybe you should talk to him about it...
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i thought about you a lot today. about what you said, and you and i in savannah as well as here in seattle. i thought about who you are and how desperately i love you. it was nice. like a long-distance hug that didn't seem so long-distance.
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My dude does sliding scale...
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i will admit though, that i talked to him earlier today. bitched and whined and got a lot of sticky, moldy stuff out in the open. i felt a little bit better.
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