He brings colour everyday and only now do I realsie that when he goes I have to fight so very hard to get the colour back.

I am fucking busy, it almost seems silly to point that out. It dawned on me the other day that I am pretty much doing the kinds of things I wanted and that is odd because it doesnt make me feel complete. There always seems like there are things left to do ( Read more... )

I wish things didnt constantly circle around my head, I wish when something troubles me I could distance myself and get some respite from the constant anaylsis, practiced monlogues and rejouvenated ideas. I wish I just didnt have to think about it ( Read more... )

So, I am back, I got back from Denmark a week this evening, later on I will depart in the icy cold for a family outing to watch Evita. I've never liked family outings. Always really wanted to distance myself from them, like we werent from the same place. I've been looking forward to this though, I like musicals. Theyre silly, badly acted and ( Read more... )

I always thought I wanted a airport moment, like you see in movies. I think in some ways I am worse that a romantic because I want things to be like they are in photos, film and my crazy imagination. But I did think saying good bye at an airport would be poetic; all that vast empty space and two people wrapped in themselves. I dont know how to ( Read more... )

I just want to talk to you about this, because you will know, you will put an unavoidable real world spin on this and it will help me. But you've gone back to halls now and maybe I went speak to you for awhile. I dont like it because I cant do it alone, because you know things I dont ( Read more... )

I love it when it is icy cold and really sunny. When the sun reflects on the frost and you can wear sunglasses on top of the endless layers you have on. I think Autumn/winter is my favourite season. I like covering skin and wrapping up warm.Touch is easier to co opt in these months and touch keeps me warm ( Read more... )

I dont know but this feels like we're moving apart. I dont want it to be. I dont want that to be the case.
I want to keep my promise that we'll forever be there for each other.
But this is my fault.
In doing something big for me, I've made things difficult in so many ways.
I feel guilty.
I've been selfish.
I just wish I could talk to you.

My body still aches a bit from the capoeira I did on Thursday, I forgot how harcore a workout it was. I just pulled and stretched pretty much every muscle in my body and despite the pain that came from walking and/or sitting down, I love it. I love it when you cant walk up stairs properly because you've danced like a maniac the night before. Feels ( Read more... )

 I am going to watch some Johansson and Rhys - Meyers loving, then sleep. I'm in a pathetic and mournful mood. But  I am pretty sure I am ok. I just feel like when I get my bike  and the internet everything will fall into place, how pathetic is that. It's my birthday on Wednesday and I could easily forget, I'll probably wake up in my strange ( Read more... )