This weekend was eventful..... memorial service, saying goodbye to my brother, fun depot and church. Whenever im alone i just feel so much pain... just my heart aches and i feel so alone.... i just want her back.... i want to earase this week and get her back.. hold on to her and never let go.... (sigh) i just can't imagine my life without her ... ( Read more... )

It's been a week.... nothing really more to say except that i really miss her... God i miss her

Well, my mothers memorial service was today ( Read more... )

I'm sick of being strong... im sick of talking... im sick of thinking... i just want to sleep... i just want to give up... i can't do this.. i can't go to the memorial service... i can't give my speech... i can't do it.. i just want her back... why is life so unfair sometimes?

So i just wrote an entry and dumb tayr tayr's puter lost it... so w.e... im jus going to rewrite the parts that i remember and that i want to still post ( Read more... )

It's hard to except that i am never going to see my mother again, while i am living here on earth. I don't know what I would do if I didn't have friends. All of your support really really helps. I don't know if u realize how much you all being there for me really means. This is the hardest thing that I have ever had to do in my life and I know that ( Read more... )

It's weird because today was spent in a complete daze of numb disbelief. Today all I kept on saying was no, my mom didn't die it's just some sick twisted joke, or I will wake up really really soon from this terrible nightmare. I really really wished that I was dreaming... i prayed that I was dreaming. When is it ok to laugh without feeling guilty ( Read more... )

This morning was the worst morning of my entire life.... i woke up, got myself some cerial and attempted to get online. I heard the door open and then i went into the kitchen. My uncle walked in, looking slightly distant... i asked where daddy was, he said he was right behind him. I went back into my room and tried to get online again, when there ( Read more... )

I had a long conversation with adam today, we were in his car on the ride home from dinner and we were talking about mike and stuff like that. I don't know. I like mike, as a friend and someone to hang with, but i don't like him like a bf... and i def dont love him, but i don't know. Maybe he'll end up not likeing me anymore and we break up. I'm ( Read more... )

I took the CPT test for dual enrollement today... im at college level reading and sentence structure.... good to know that i can read and write but i cant count worth shit... im at highschool level alg 2... which is norm i guess since im in geo right now. So I can take my comp and psyc classes over the summer which i am very happy for. I think the ( Read more... )