i was just out riding around with a couple friends.. looking for a place to live.. and i couldn't stand it. how and why did my life change so quickly? i went from having it all.. to having nothing.. and now i dont want to keep going on. i dont mean suicde.. just i am numb and don't have a care, other then getting my baby back. it really hit me ( Read more... )

i'm not completely bitter.. i promise.. the end was a little harsh.. i just had every kind of emotion go through my body and i guess it came out through my fingers ( Read more... )

god damn this fucking hurts.. i've given up.. not because i want to.. because i still want her in my life.. but because i need to give up. i had a minor escape today at my dads.. after losing it over there.. again.. my dad told me to stay there tonight.. that i didn't need to be in this apartment. i agreed.. i don't need to be in this apt. but i ( Read more... )

tonight will be the toughest of my life.. i need help.. i need someway to prove that this is real.. that our love for each other can overcome these bumps we've been hitting. i need a dictonary on how to shake the one you love straight, without physically shaking them. i need the strength to be tough-minded. i've never had the need to be with ( Read more... )

well.. as hard as it is to type this.. its 100 times harder to think it.. erica, my love, my life, my soul, has broken my heart... and as much as i'm fighting for it, i know its a losing battle, and i don't understand why. this was suppose to be it.. this was my life and i couldn't be happier. i have great friends, a great job, i'm going to be ( Read more... )

silence isn't golden. its inconsiderate and selfish, when there is absolutely no reason for it. i've done things in my life to be treated certain ways, bad and good. I'm usually accepting of either, just so long as they are vaild. but i've never been this hurt and upset by something, that has no reason or cause. i'm in limbo, my heart is ( Read more... )

i don't even know what to say.. 5th or 6th time i've gone to see the redsox in st. pete.. and they've lost EVERY time.. and not just.. they were getting beat the whole game type of thing.. they were up 6-1 at one point and 6-2 in the 7th.. i'm a jinx.. its offical.. but its so hard to turn down seeing them live.. i was confident on the drive over ( Read more... )

there's a quote from a movie (title is slipping my mind right now) that has continously been stuck in my head for a while now.. "when is enough, enough?" to which is answered "never... never is it ever enough when it has to do with love". i've been telling myself that multlple times a day, for months. but then doubt sets in, and my trust leaves ( Read more... )

things were good.. very good.. maybe it was the time apart.. or maybe it was the pure love..

then it happened again.......... heartbreak...

the only time i think i'll be happy, is when this apartment has more then 1 soul in it..

you really are the beat in my heart..

off to play video games..

i want you here as bad as i don't want you here ( Read more... )