Malfoy,

If you're quite keen on projecting your tendencies onto me, I'd suggest saying something less absurd. Of course, if you've designs on the necklace, you could always just ask. I'm certain your fiancee wouldn't mind.

~BZ

Something akin to that, yes. There are worlds of difference between Gryffindor girls and Slytherin ladies.

How did you find your Hogsmeade date?

~BZ

Dear Merlin of course not. Though I suppose she might have misconstrued my intentions, but I've set that straight.

~BZ

Believe you me, I wonder exactly the same thing all the time.

~BZ

Daphne,

Your day sounds more brilliant than mine.

I miss relatively sane people, is that so wrong?

~BZ

Daphne,

I have seen the light.

How was your Hogsmeade trip?

~BZ

Ms Parvati Patil,

It troubles me to have to write this letter at such a terrible moment in your life, but I believe I cannot let things go on as they do before you think you can cry to me or something hideously girly like that. While I did somehow enjoy the time we've spent together, I think that we are simply two very different people with very ( Read more... )

Merlin, what's happened?

~BZ

PS. You owe me.

You can have that Gryff if you want, Malfoy, she wasn't very fun.

~BZ

Me doth think the lady protest too much.

Because a goatee is so much better.