Give me that moment before the greatest time of your life. It’s always anticipated, it’s always a blood rush to the head. Take me straight to the top of that mountain, the climax, the edge of a perfect tilted angle and bring me straight back down, let me drop…hard and fast. Right now I have to feel it; he greets me with a smile, a lustful goodbye ( Read more... )

Bright scribbled swearing on plain bathroom stall walls, you stand in front of them, innocent expression on your face. These stalls playing the background at the moment contain more gossip than I could withhold, but this fact doesn’t matter an ounce at the moment, or the fact that there’s a “Niki sucks cock” rumor written in huge magic marker to ( Read more... )

Yesterday was an interesting birthday to say the least. I got gifts I completely hated and couldn’t get over my apathetic attitude, this dark comedy life isn't good for me ( Read more... )

So it’s come to this! Finding time to write has been tricky, oh yes it has been. Time; impossible, fast, and unstoppable; I never know how to use it in my best interest, I hardly ever care. I’d rather stare at the wood paneled wall and contemplate which year in the 70s this school had to be built or stare at the ground and have the vision of ( Read more... )

I awoke. Time: 10 seconds prior to collapsing. Give me consideration. Give me blankets. Give me a break. Today it rained. Just like yesterday, and the day before that. Always at the same time, right around noon, that’s when I stay for hours thinking and working in the library. Stare at the same math equation that reads: a+b + (3b+8a) 9=? The ( Read more... )

Psychotherapy is the way of getting over depression, but just the fact that the word “psycho” is in the title makes me hesitant. Or you go to see a therapist but the word “rapist” is in that word, and that just makes me uneasy. Who names these things anyways? Jeez. Let me take a rain check on that. I’ve sold my life to playing dead and listening to ( Read more... )

So here it goes, you take a seat on the empty chair facing the blank computer screen. See the image of a girl with wild curly lion hair with her eyes rolled back, now losing the strength to even hold her head up enough to notice the computer’s off. Shoulders tighten, stomach churning, wrists itchy; you’re just a key example for all those teen ( Read more... )

When did I get hypnotized by society’s shallow stupidity? Because I didn’t write that chapter of my life, I had nothing to do with it. I was too busy being ( Read more... )

Loud noises creating anxiety, things would have never been like this if I hadn’t gotten that note. The one that read “Summer School Remediation Policies” Dates: June 16th to July 18th excluding July 4th. Oh great, another month of the books I’ve neglected for a reason. They aren’t of any value to writing or to a suicidal girl who might die tomorrow ( Read more... )

I’m dazed, I’m silent, I’m lost; this is what it feels like to shut down, live on the moon, be just an infinite dream. You would have sworn I was an insomniac if you saw me. In the past few days. I’ve stared in a daydream while people spoke to me on multiple occasions. I’ve stayed quiet when being asked a question, I’ve lain down to just stare and ( Read more... )