you are my friend!

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i had a baby.

she's here now, and she's a tiny human.

it amazes me that this same little person was here with me for nine months before she breathed air, and was officially herei lay in bed soon after taking the pregnancy test and thought about her dna, how even though she was only a tiny piece of tissue, all her direction were already written ( Read more... )

i wonder where the urge to write has gone.

to the bottoms of coffee cups and wine glasses, abstained from?

away from my mushy brain, which can discuss and notice, but not distill into words.

still waiting around here, for this baby. one week til due date.

this room, and the past year ( Read more... )

i stepped outside the front door and walked down to the port, the area so close to my house, yet rarely explored. worth exploring. the familiar streets ended at a sign that said sidewalk ends, use other side. i disregarded these directions and picked my way through sand studded with trash and broken cement slabs, feathery fennel blowing against my ( Read more... )

such a hot, hot day. 30 degrees hotter than yesterday, it feels. as i rode my bike through new neighborhoods, the streets with sycamore trees expanding with green, it felt like another city entirely. the air ( Read more... )

the phases of this blending of time passing. a while ago i was concerned about my open mouth and lack of presence behind it, in the break room at work, in the classroom. from the vantage point of my bed, feeling out of control, disconnected from the body i inhabit each day ( Read more... )

there is a giant fly buzzing low around my room.

when you haven't written in your livejournal for months, you can't just make a post about a fly buzzing low around your room. but it's the need for something momentous that keeps me from recording thoughts here.

one small thought, added at regular intervals.

i often see the one legged punk at the intersection of market and gough. her dog, a white pitbull with black over one eye, walks between her crutches, right where her right leg would be.

the last shower of my twenties feels somehow significant.