i just want to be able to stop feeling this way. i wish i knew what this feeling was. i just feel myself spinning out of control. i want to throw up. literally. i wish i was throwing up right now instead of sitting here like this. i am so sick and tired of sitting here like this. i feel so awful. i just feel terrible. this is pathetic. i need to ( Read more... )

i think something might be wrong with me...

when i'm really upset, i never know why. it's always a little amorphous. a little ambiguous. a little ridiculous. i hate this. i want to go home...actually...i don't...i want to stop feeling everything. i'd like to become numb. i think if i stopped talking to people it would kind of help. but that's kind of conspicuous and i don't want that kind of ( Read more... )

i havent been good at anything in a long time. i'm such a disappointment. its ridiculous. sometimes it would be nice to just kick some fucking ass. no one gets how disheartening it can be to just suck at life. death death death death death death death...yeah, thats how i feel.

basically i am ridiculous. maybe the guys are right. maybe girls are irrational. either way, i probably am pretty irrational. i doubt most girls are as completely and utterly insane as i so obviously am, but i really can't know that for sure. i am legitimately upset right now and i have no idea why. jd asked me repeatedly but i had no answer to ( Read more... )

i think my biggest fear is that i piss off/annoy the people that i want to like me the most. it is that thought that silences me, that makes me unsure of myself, that makes me want to curl up into a ball and sleep away my awkwardness. and i am so awkward...and goofy. i dont mind being goofy though. it's kind of liberating. if its just generally ( Read more... )

ok so i'm not going to become a nun. that much is clear. but i am definitely not dealing with these stupid immature asshole freshmen boys and their upperclassmen asshole counterparts. i dont need that kind of bullshit. i just dont understand why it is so physically impossible to be honest and upfront with people. it seems like no one is willing to ( Read more... )

i really dont like it when people dont like me or rather, if people just think little of me ( Read more... )

i realized today that i am the awkward wierdo, not him and not really most other people ( Read more... )

i just went to the ann coulter/peter beinart debate ( Read more... )