I know that life ain't always good to you ( Read more... )

I wish I believed in angels. Or magic. Or god. Or anything really. Life is much easier when you believe in something. There is a reason, or if there is no reason, at least there is hope. At least maybe we are not all alone in this ride. I have the inability to believe…the cynical sardonic attitude that makes it impossible for anything unproven to ( Read more... )

Love songs for the tragic
You've always been so tragic
Some king of fucked up magic
Over me
This is my spell for you
-for you-

Got two new lizards today! They are awfully cute!

Yay!

And i must keep saying...

I cannot collapse...no matter how badly i want to...there is work to be done...animals to care for...things to do.

Do not fall down.

I talked to bob yesterday. Which was good. Good in the sense that it was necessary. There was so much we needed to talk about and get out in the open. So much explaining. So much apologizing. So many tears to cry that have been held back. So many memories that have been repressed. So much to say...no matter how painful it is. Mistakes must be ( Read more... )

Trying not to think about anything. But i've been holding it back for awhile...not thinking....not talking...not expressing. Pretending. Floods of memories. Anger and sadness. Confusion.

No one will ever understand.

I've been hiding a part of me.

what do i do?

I like icky today. Im not sure why. I ate a really healthy breakfast/lunch, which i hoped woul;d help make me feel better, but it didnt :( I took a shower, which i also hoped would help me feel better, but that didnt either. So now i am sitting in front of the fan feeling like BLECH ( Read more... )

Upset. Not that anybody cares.

Its a strange feeling, but all of the sudden i hate everybody. I feel like screaming out for attention but at the same time telling everyone to fuck off. I feel used and abused. Cheated and abandoned. Lied to.

I hate you.

Pissed. Not that it fucking matters.

...but since i have a double ( Read more... )