I've never been happier or more in love in my whole life.


( Read more... )

Days like today when all I feel like doing is catching up with myself, cleaning my house, reading, and eating a bunch of doughnuts are the days when pregnancy suits me best. :)

I've been totally slacking on blogging. No time for my life lately.

I'm good. I've got a vaulted ceiling and colors all over the place, peeking out where one wouldn't expect brightness. Kind of like my brain lately. It's the place where I live.

I wonder, sometimes, where my sadness has gone off to.

I have a boyfriend :)

The early morning hours are always my favorite, even if I don't see them very often. I started the day around six this morning...waking up to haze and humidity. Driving with coffee and the newspaper back to the comfort of Tina's kitchen table, with invisible rain drops sticking to my hair.

someone like you
and all you know, and how you speak

A long ( Read more... )

May 10, 2009

It's strange to think of how much I've changed. I say it over and over, but I never can quite feel it entirely. Today I'm close. My eyes are dry and my face unmoving. I feel pain no longer as a shot to the heart, but in a tingling in my skin. It's a new skin-- soft, but thicker than before. Instead of tears, my bitterness shows through ( Read more... )

I feel really little today. A small person with no control, and I'm guessing that's stemming from the lecture I'm sitting in right now. My professor is talking about Rousseau and the social contract right now and how we are all just part of society and without society, we aren't people. The very idea of that scares me. I imagine myself floating in ( Read more... )

Dear Heart,
I fucking hate you.

Love,
Jakki

Things have been so crazy lately. My life never fails to make its way off my layed out tracks. No matter what I do.

But I have found that once I make peace with the chaos, once I accept that everything is utterly out of my ultimate control, it all gets better. Boggles my mind, really.

But hey, I'm smiling.

 It's been raining like crazy here...but I expected that, I suppose. I'm pale and overworked. But what better to throw all of my empty hours into ( Read more... )