pick one band and describe yourself using only the titles of their songs: TORI AMOS ( Read more... )

There is pain but we cause the suffering by the stories we tell ourselves about the pain.

maybe we all are caught up in the pleasure of the pain...

a lot of good things have been happening in my life *karma 3773962962, god's revenge 3297486367* i won a lot of prestigious awards for my work this year and came home with five plaques, six roses, two pins, a graduation honor code, and a ton of certificates. i'm proud but... it's funny. i have wanted recognition all year and now that it has come i ( Read more... )

as i was walking away the other day, i realized how much more confident and outgoing i am than i used to be. lessons have been learned & i endured. i fight the battles that need to be fought and don't take unnecessary shit from anyone. my chains are cut and i am alone ( Read more... )

been drinking more often than is probably good for me. just got back from a surprise party for a friend who's turning 20. i didn't drive drunk from either party tonight but i certainly was buzzed heavily. a long time ago, i pledged to myself that i wouldn't drink & drive. now i do it because i just don't care anymore...

i was in a fiery rage earlier, screaming profanities on the top of my lungs and throwing shit across the room, pounding the pillow against the door again and again and again. i have never been so angry and hateful toward anyone in my life ever before. i want to physically, strategically kill the person responsible and make them pay dammit because i ( Read more... )

survived my hell week of school and it went well, considering. had to create a website for my internet class and i was so proud of how it turned out (lol). next week is the famous conference on world affairs in boulder. it's awesome - good speakers and panels

yet

it's raining and all i can do is lay in bed incapacitated and remember...

kevin is moving to las vegas for school now and will be moving in with his girlfriend of three years, amanda. it breaks my heart. true, they love each other but he admittedly is not in love. he stays with her because he doesn't want to hurt her feelings and take a risk for once in his life. stop taking the easy road. i wish that i could be with him ( Read more... )

i learned how to skateboard today. made great connections with two very different people on two diverse levels of pain. relationships are about those moments or hours of intense understanding not for what you should be, but simply who you are. people often confuse my bursts of energy and perky persona for happiness. i learned that it is okay to be ( Read more... )

one day you'll understand what it's like to feel how i do in this moment, in this year, in this life. then we'll talk.