Did you hear my acceptance speech?:
"I quit. I quit. i fucking quit."

i miss you..

today is one of the greatest days in the entire year 12-12-04

school makes me feel like a failure and a worthless human being. which makes me turn to alcohol.school fuels alcoholism. i dunno if thats bad or not but hangovers really fucking suck. this isnt one of those "oh man i got a B-" failures either. its failure in every sense of the word. i am hating everything right now. i hate how stupid i am. i hate ( Read more... )

its a good thing i find humor in abrupt unceremonious endings because thats exactly what this is. im disturbed by this turn of events. in fact i couldnt sleep last night because i couldnt stop laughing at myself. the sheer stupidity of myself. all amounted to nothing. maybe my sense of humor is completely warped, but the absurdity of my life never ( Read more... )

looking forward to a flatlined love affair the comfort of a dire lovesickness ive come to cherish bed sores and the salt in my own tears my beautiful affliction your kiss festers like a boil i find myself ugly in your eyes of asylum scenery have you come to take me away take me away darling you are a disease that spreads like sunshine the vultures ( Read more... )

times i am desperately afraid of dying alone but then i think to myself isnt dying necessarily an independent process? i mean of course dying with someone you love sitting next to you holding your hand isnt nearly the same as collapsing on the floor of your run-down studio apartment with all your cats walking around you too snooty to care. or is it ( Read more... )

im sorry

its times like these that i wish i could start my life all over again and do it right this time. maybe id even be religious so maybe god wouldnt want to fuck me over every now and then. seriously just when things start to look up gods all like "HAHA...just kidding!" and then rains all sorts of shit down on me and i get hit by lightning. then he ( Read more... )

i almost got upset today but i managed to suppress it (which will most likely come back to bite me in the ass in the form of a month-long anger rampage). these days i hate being alone with my thoughts because theyre evil and make me loathe myself. strange how i never used to mind being alone. i even enjoyed it. but now i constantly need to occupy ( Read more... )