Never Trust Doctors

[rubikscomplex]

Hello, sick people! In the interest of saving time and avoiding a lot of boring chitchat later, I'm Doctor Gregor Haus; you can call me "Greg." I'm one of two healers staffing in the hospital wing. Madame Pomphrey is off on official business for the nurses' union, because let's face it, nurses don't get paid enough to help people like you. So

Comments

[scandalqueen]

Its a miracle!
Nice to see a new face around. I'm Rita Skeeter. THANK YOU!!!!! Pomfreys gone! *does little dance*

[giddy_like_me]

Hello, Dr. Haus. I'm Gideon Prewett. I don't expect you to remember me but I don't want you to confuse me with my twin brother, Gideon. We're fraternal but some people still confuse me with him. Anyway, he's the more accident prone one and you *might* just be seeing him more often.

Glad to have you aboard, sir. Hope you don't have too much of a good time here.

[academic_hobo]

I think that the the monkey would have difficulty with the child-proof Motrin bottle, myself.

[rubikscomplex]

They're very inventive. You'd be surprised.

[academic_hobo]

I thought you having opposable thumbs were rather a prequesite to getting those things open, but then I guess monkeys can be clever little buggers.

[rubikscomplex]

As they happen to have four opposable thumbs, I'd say they were at an advantage.

[rileyannemcg]

Oh, but Vicodin is so wonderful! If only you would share it with me. It could help me with my Potions exam. Well, not so much help as make me forget the damn thing even exists.

Hello Dr. Haus. I'm Riley McGranahan, 6th year Hufflepuff and it is my pleasure to welcome you to the nuthouse Hogwarts.

[rubikscomplex]

No! It's mine! You can't have any! And this place doesn't have enough of it as it is.

[rileyannemcg]

Oh, please? *pouts* Are you kidding? This place is full of painkillers if you know where to look. It may not necessarily be Vicodin, but still.

[rubikscomplex]

Aww, well now that you put it that way... no. It's important, doctor stuff. It would be unethical. And as the philosopher Jagger once said, "You can't always get what you want." If it's not Vicodin, it's not breakfast. And I don't have any antidepressants to counterract the hallucinations associated with LCD.

[omg_siriusly]

((What the hell are you talking about, bastardizing him?! You're doing a GREAT job. ♥))

[rubikscomplex]

((I just have to think about being in character more than I do with James. Haha.))

[greenmeadowes]

((Narfzmpzap *aka unintelligible noise*. ICON!))

[rubikscomplex]

((If I didn't know any better, I'd almost say you liked that one!))